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Making love to your wife is like shooting at sitting ducks.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Love
Like
Ducks
Shooting
Sitting
Wife
Successful
Making

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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If women dressed for men, the stores wouldn't sell much - just an occasional sun visor.
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I never go to movies where the hero's tits are bigger than the heroine's.
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I have an agreement with the houseflies. The flies don't practice law and I don't walk on the ceiling.
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If income tax is the price you have to pay to keep the government on its feet, alimony is the price we have to pay for sweeping a woman off hers.
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Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
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There's one way to find out if a man is honest - ask him. If he says, 'Yes,' you know he is a crook.
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If you've heard this story before, don't stop me, because I'd like to hear it again.
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Now that you're Secretary of War, what kind of an army do you think we ought to have?
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Gerald Ford was unknown throughout America. Now he's unknown throughout the world.
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I must confess, I was born at a very early age.
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Don't be silly. I'll write you twice a week.
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To write an autobiography of Groucho Marx would be as asinine as to read an autobiography of Groucho Marx.
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Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
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Well, art is art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water.
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Some day there will have to be some new rules established about name-calling. I don't mean the routine cursing that goes on between husband and wife, but the naming of defenseless, unsuspecting babies.
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I think you've got something there, but I'll wait outside until you clean it up.
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The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around. If you write about someone else, you can stretch the truth from here to Finland. If you write about yourself the slightest deviation makes you realize instantly that there may be honor among thieves, but you are just a dirty liar.
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You're only as young as the woman you feel.
Groucho Marx
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If the garbage man calls, tell him we don't want any.
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There's only two things you can start without a plan: a riot and a family, for everything else you need a plan.
Groucho Marx