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You've got a goal in life. I've got a goal. Now all we need is a football team.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Need
Needs
Life
Nfl
Football
Team
Goal

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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When discovered by his wife, kissing the maid, Groucho said, I was just whispering in her mouth
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You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar.
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Obviously there was no point in being a bachelor if his houseman was going to filch his booze. If he was going to get robbed, he might just as well get married.
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The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around. If you write about someone else, you can stretch the truth from here to Finland. If you write about yourself the slightest deviation makes you realize instantly that there may be honor among thieves, but you are just a dirty liar.
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Well, Art is Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now you tell me what you know.
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I'm not a vegetarian, but I eat animals who are.
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I am a man and you are a woman. I can't think of a better arrangement.
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If women dressed for men, the stores wouldn't sell much - just an occasional sun visor.
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There's one way to find out if a man is honest - ask him. If he says, 'Yes,' you know he is a crook.
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Comedians are a much rarer and far more valuable commodity than all the gold and precious stones in the world.
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I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
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Women should be obscene, not heard.
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What have future generations ever done for us?
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Three years ago I came to Florida without a nickel in my pocket. Now I've got a nickel in my pocket
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Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water!
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Budget: a way of going broke methodically
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You get a canoe later and I'll paddle you.
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Oh, are you from Wales? Do you know a fella named Jonah-He used to live in whales for a while
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I was going to thrash them within an inch of their lives, but I didn't have a tape measure.
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To write an autobiography of Groucho Marx would be as asinine as to read an autobiography of Groucho Marx.
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