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You've got a goal in life. I've got a goal. Now all we need is a football team.
Groucho Marx
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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Goal
Need
Needs
Life
Nfl
Football
Team
More quotes by Groucho Marx
Let there be dancing in the streets, drinking in the saloons, and necking in the parlor.
Groucho Marx
If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.
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Remember men, you are fighting for the ladies honor, which is probably more than she ever did.
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There's one thing I always wanted to do before I quit... Retire!
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If women dressed for men, the stores wouldn't sell much - just an occasional sun visor.
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Come on in girls, and leave all hope behind.
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I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book. . . . I think a lot of people who hate literature but love fried eggs would buy it if the price was right.
Groucho Marx
Well I thought my razor was dull until I heard his speech, and that reminds me of a story that's so dirty I'm ashamed to think of it myself.
Groucho Marx
The first part of the party of the first part shall be known in this contract as the first part of the party of the first part shall be known in this contract-- Look, why should we quarrel about a thing like this? We'll take it right out, eh?
Groucho Marx
There's only two things you can start without a plan: a riot and a family, for everything else you need a plan.
Groucho Marx
Mr.Blank's reputation as a card shark had preceded him. No one accused him of being dishonest, but on the other hand no one accused him of being honest.
Groucho Marx
I eat like a vulture. Unfortunately the resemblance doesn't end there.
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Even the intellectual crowd will have none of me. Physically, I look like one of them. Graying at the temples, I walk with a slight limp and wear thick glasses.
Groucho Marx
Oh, are you from Wales? Do you know a fella named Jonah-He used to live in whales for a while
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I never go to movies where the hero's tits are bigger than the heroine's.
Groucho Marx
She's afraid that if she leaves, she'll become the life of the party.
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Heifer cow is better than none, but this is no time for puns
Groucho Marx
Before you speak, make certain you have something worthwhile to say.
Groucho Marx
The Arab and the camel are inseparable. It's been said that and Arab would give up his wife rather than give up his camel. Personally, I haven't got a camel, but I think it's a great idea.
Groucho Marx
Blood's not thicker than money.
Groucho Marx
