Quote

This book was written in those long hours I spent waiting for my wife to get dressed to go out. And if she had never gotten dressed at all this book would never have been written.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Reading
Funny
Dressed
Book
Gotten
Long
Spent
Never
Wife
Would
Written
Waiting
Hours

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Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other 999 follow women.
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What have future generations ever done for us?
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Television is where you watch people in your living room that you would not want near your house.
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Anybody who doesn't like this book is healthy
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A cigar makers organization once said that I was the most famous cigar smoker in the world. I dont know if thats true, but once while visiting Havana, I went to a cigar factory. There were four hundred people there rolling cigars, and when they saw me, they all stood up and applauded.
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I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.
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Remember men, you are fighting for the ladies honor, which is probably more than she ever did.
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I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place to get a decent meal.
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Why don't you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?
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Poverty makes people sub-human Excess of wealth makes people inhuman
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[Mrs. Teasdale]: He's had a change of heart. [Groucho]: A lot of good that'll do him. He's still got the same face.
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The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around. If you write about someone else, you can stretch the truth from here to Finland. If you write about yourself the slightest deviation makes you realize instantly that there may be honor among thieves, but you are just a dirty liar.
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A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
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I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining.
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I'll never forget my wedding day... they threw vitamin pills
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Mrs. Teasdale congratulates him on his coronation and sovereignty: The eyes of the world are upon you. Notables from every country are gathered here in your honor. This is a gala day for you. Firefly replies: Well, a gal a day is enough for me. I don't think I could handle any more.
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