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A clown is like aspirin, only he works twice as fast.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Funny
Clowning
Like
Aspirin
Clown
Twice
Fast
Works
Humor
Inspiration

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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I write by ear. I tried writing with the typewriter, but I found it too unwieldy
Groucho Marx
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Hail, hail Freedonia, land of the free!
Groucho Marx
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Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse.
Groucho Marx
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Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does.
Groucho Marx
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A thing that has always baffled me about women is that they will saturate themselves with a pint of perfume, a pound of sachet powder, an evil-smelling lip rouge, a peculiar-smelling hair ointment and a half-dozen varieties of body oils, and then have the effrontery to complain of the aroma of a fine dollar cigar.
Groucho Marx
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No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend.
Groucho Marx
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Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx
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I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
Groucho Marx
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I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book. . . . I think a lot of people who hate literature but love fried eggs would buy it if the price was right.
Groucho Marx
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Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.
Groucho Marx
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Oh, why can't we break away from all this, just you and I, and lodge with my fleas in the hills? I mean flee to my lodge in the hills.
Groucho Marx
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The Two Most Important Words In The World Are Honesty And Sincerity, If You Can Fake These You've Got It Made.
Groucho Marx
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Humor is reason gone mad.
Groucho Marx
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Now that you're Secretary of War, what kind of an army do you think we ought to have?
Groucho Marx
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Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.
Groucho Marx
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One woman and one man might have been OK in your grandmother's day, but who wants to marry your grandmother? Not even your grandfather!
Groucho Marx
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Years ago, I tried to top everybody, but I don't anymore. I realized it was killing conversation. When you're always trying for a topper you aren't really listening. It ruins communication
Groucho Marx
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Why, I'd horse-whip you if I had a horse.
Groucho Marx
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Every time someone turns on a TV, I go in the other room and read.
Groucho Marx
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I've been looking for a girl like you - not you, but a girl like you.
Groucho Marx