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A clown is like aspirin, only he works twice as fast.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Clown
Twice
Fast
Works
Humor
Inspiration
Funny
Clowning
Like
Aspirin

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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Making love to your wife is like shooting at sitting ducks.
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Two women at a resort discussed dinner: The food here is lousy, the first noted. You're right! And such small portions!! the second added
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My experience is that people are most likely to listen to reason when in bed.
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Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.
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He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days.
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There's only two things you can start without a plan: a riot and a family, for everything else you need a plan.
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Anybody who doesn't like this book is healthy
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The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around. If you write about someone else, you can stretch the truth from here to Finland. If you write about yourself the slightest deviation makes you realize instantly that there may be honor among thieves, but you are just a dirty liar.
Groucho Marx
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Well, Art is Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now you tell me what you know.
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Given the choice between a woman and a cigar, I will always choose the cigar.
Groucho Marx
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Time wounds all heels.
Groucho Marx
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I can see you in the kitchen bending over a hot stove, and I can't see the stove
Groucho Marx
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The Two Most Important Words In The World Are Honesty And Sincerity, If You Can Fake These You've Got It Made.
Groucho Marx
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Many years ago I chased a woman for almost two years, only to discover that her tastes were exactly like mine: we both were crazy about girls.
Groucho Marx
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You're only as young as the woman you feel.
Groucho Marx
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If you were a man, you'd go into business for yourself. I know a fellow who started out last year with just a canoe. Now he's got more women than you can shake a stick at, if that's your idea of a good time.
Groucho Marx
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If you want to see a comic strip, you should see me in the shower.
Groucho Marx
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Let there be dancing in the streets, drinking in the saloons, and necking in the parlor.
Groucho Marx
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Comedians are a much rarer and far more valuable commodity than all the gold and precious stones in the world.
Groucho Marx
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Why, I'd horse-whip you if I had a horse.
Groucho Marx