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No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Name
Names
Funny
Groucho
Real
Sarcasm
Sarcastic
Breaking
Friend
Humor

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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Why would I want to join an organization that would encourage people like myself to become members.
Groucho Marx
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That's nothing - my alarm clock is set for eight.
Groucho Marx
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The Arab and the camel are inseparable. It's been said that and Arab would give up his wife rather than give up his camel. Personally, I haven't got a camel, but I think it's a great idea.
Groucho Marx
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When discovered by his wife, kissing the maid, Groucho said, I was just whispering in her mouth
Groucho Marx
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Time flies like an arrow fruit flies like a banana
Groucho Marx
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How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them.
Groucho Marx
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A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
Groucho Marx
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I'll teach you to kick me...' You don't need to teach me--I already know how!
Groucho Marx
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If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.
Groucho Marx
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[He] may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot.
Groucho Marx
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What have future generations ever done for us?
Groucho Marx
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Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.
Groucho Marx
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You are going Uruguay, and I'm going my way
Groucho Marx
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He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days.
Groucho Marx
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Only if the computers really love each other.
Groucho Marx
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Come on in girls, and leave all hope behind.
Groucho Marx
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The Two Most Important Words In The World Are Honesty And Sincerity, If You Can Fake These You've Got It Made.
Groucho Marx
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Now there's a man with an open mind - you can feel the breeze from here!
Groucho Marx
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Anyone buying this book is going to be out a tidy sum if he is sucked in by the title. I wish I could write a real sexy book that would be barred from the mails. Apparently nothing whets a reader's appetite for literature more than the news that the author has been thrown into a federal pokey for disturbing the libido of millions of Americans.
Groucho Marx
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It's hard to get ivory in Africa, but in Alabama the Tuscaloosa
Groucho Marx