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Bel Air, I am convinced, was laid out by some diabolic sadist who deliberately decided not to use a compass or a surveyor.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Convinced
Diabolic
Air
Sadist
Decided
Surveyors
Funny
Deliberately
Use
Compass
Laid
Witty
Humorous

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Given the choice between a woman and a cigar, I will always choose the cigar.
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Ever since they found out that Lassie was a boy, the public has believed the worst about Hollywood
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This book was written in those long hours I spent waiting for my wife to get dressed to go out. And if she had never gotten dressed at all this book would never have been written.
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Do you suppose I could buy back my introduction to you?
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Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
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When discovered by his wife, kissing the maid, Groucho said, I was just whispering in her mouth
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If you've heard this story before, don't stop me, because I'd like to hear it again.
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Budget: a way of going broke methodically
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Why a four-year-old child could understand this report. Run out and find me a four-year-old child. I can't make head nor tail out of it.
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It's hard to get ivory in Africa, but in Alabama the Tuscaloosa
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I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.
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Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.
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A moose is an animal with horns on the front of its head and a hunting lodge wall on the back of it
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I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt.
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Making love to your wife is like shooting at sitting ducks.
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She's so in love with me, she doesn't know anything. That's why she's in love with me.
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Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.
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My mother loved children - she would have given anything if I had been one.
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