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I don't know. When I was born there was a nurse taking care of me. What's the matter? Couldn't the nurse take care of herself? Sure she could. I just found that out too late.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Take
Couldn
Late
Taking
Sure
Born
Found
Care
Matter
Nurse

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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[Mrs. Teasdale]: He's had a change of heart. [Groucho]: A lot of good that'll do him. He's still got the same face.
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Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.
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Marry me and I'll never look at another horse!
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I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
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Why, I'd horse-whip you if I had a horse.
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She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
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You know I could rent you out as a decoy for duck hunters?
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Remember, the grass is always greener where you don't happen to be the neighbor.
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Some day there will have to be some new rules established about name-calling. I don't mean the routine cursing that goes on between husband and wife, but the naming of defenseless, unsuspecting babies.
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When discovered by his wife, kissing the maid, Groucho said, I was just whispering in her mouth
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I'm not a vegetarian, but I eat animals who are.
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John you say you met in an elevator. Was the elevator going up at the time, or down? This is very important, for going down in an elevator one always has that sinking feeling and for all I know you may have this confused with love. If you were going up, it is clearly a case of love at first sight.
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Let there be dancing in the streets, drinking in the saloons, and necking in the parlor.
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Mr.Blank's reputation as a card shark had preceded him. No one accused him of being dishonest, but on the other hand no one accused him of being honest.
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As soon as I get through with you, you'll have a clear case for divorce and so will my wife.
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Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.
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The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around. If you write about someone else, you can stretch the truth from here to Finland. If you write about yourself the slightest deviation makes you realize instantly that there may be honor among thieves, but you are just a dirty liar.
Groucho Marx
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Budget: a way of going broke methodically
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I shall drink no # wine before it's time! OK, it's time.
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Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
Groucho Marx