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The only real laughter comes from despair.
Groucho Marx
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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Real
Witty
Humorous
Laughter
Despair
Laughing
Funny
Comes
More quotes by Groucho Marx
You are going Uruguay, and I'm going my way
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Remember men, you are fighting for the ladies honor, which is probably more than she ever did.
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I've got the brain of a four year old. I'll bet he was glad to be rid of it.
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If the garbage man calls, tell him we don't want any.
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You get a canoe later and I'll paddle you.
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Television is where you watch people in your living room that you would not want near your house.
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Anyone buying this book is going to be out a tidy sum if he is sucked in by the title. I wish I could write a real sexy book that would be barred from the mails. Apparently nothing whets a reader's appetite for literature more than the news that the author has been thrown into a federal pokey for disturbing the libido of millions of Americans.
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If it gets any hotter in here I could use a big fan.
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I was going to thrash them within an inch of their lives, but I didn't have a tape measure.
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A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
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I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.
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Here's to our wives and girlfriends...may they never meet!
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Hail, hail Freedonia, land of the free!
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Comedians are a much rarer and far more valuable commodity than all the gold and precious stones in the world.
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Patience is the art of finding something else to do.
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She's afraid that if she leaves, she'll become the life of the party.
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Middle age is when you go to bed at night and hope you feel better in the morning. Old age is when you go to bed at night and hope you wake up in the morning.
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You know I could rent you out as a decoy for duck hunters?
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Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.
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There's a man outside with a big black mustache. - Tell him I've got one.
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