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Hail, hail Freedonia, land of the free!

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Land
Free
Funny
Hail
Witty
Humorous

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them.
Groucho Marx
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I was going to thrash them within an inch of their lives, but I didn't have a tape measure.
Groucho Marx
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Oh, why can't we break away from all this, just you and I, and lodge with my fleas in the hills? I mean flee to my lodge in the hills.
Groucho Marx
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I'm not a vegetarian, but I eat animals who are.
Groucho Marx
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Some day there will have to be some new rules established about name-calling. I don't mean the routine cursing that goes on between husband and wife, but the naming of defenseless, unsuspecting babies.
Groucho Marx
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You've got a goal in life. I've got a goal. Now all we need is a football team.
Groucho Marx
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Oh, are you from Wales? Do you know a fella named Jonah-He used to live in whales for a while
Groucho Marx
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If you've heard this story before, don't stop me, because I'd like to hear it again.
Groucho Marx
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If you were a man, you'd go into business for yourself. I know a fellow who started out last year with just a canoe. Now he's got more women than you can shake a stick at, if that's your idea of a good time.
Groucho Marx
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A cigar makers organization once said that I was the most famous cigar smoker in the world. I dont know if thats true, but once while visiting Havana, I went to a cigar factory. There were four hundred people there rolling cigars, and when they saw me, they all stood up and applauded.
Groucho Marx
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Firefly: Where is your husband? Mrs. Teasdale: Why, he's dead. Firefly: I'll bet he's just using that as an excuse. Mrs. Teasdale: I was with him to the very end. Firefly: Hmmph. No wonder he passed away. Mrs. Teasdale: I held him in my arms and kissed him. Firefly: Oh I see. Then, it was murder.
Groucho Marx
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If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.
Groucho Marx
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Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.
Groucho Marx
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I don't want to join the kind of a club that accepts people like me as members.
Groucho Marx
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Hello, I must be going, I cannot stay, I came to say, I must be going. I’m glad I came, but just the same, I must be going.
Groucho Marx
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Madam, you're making history, in fact, you're making me, and I wish you'd keep my hands to yourself
Groucho Marx
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Today's Father Day and we're giving you a tie, it's not much you know, it's just our way of showing you, you're a regular guy.
Groucho Marx
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Before you speak, make certain you have something worthwhile to say.
Groucho Marx
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If the garbage man calls, tell him we don't want any.
Groucho Marx
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Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.
Groucho Marx