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Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Mind
Comedy
Everybody
Half
Funny
Write
Practically
Doe
Witty
Book
Humorous
Writing
York

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No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend.
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That's nothing - my alarm clock is set for eight.
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She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
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I don't have change I'd have to give you nine more books
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I write by ear. I tried writing with the typewriter, but I found it too unwieldy
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Some day there will have to be some new rules established about name-calling. I don't mean the routine cursing that goes on between husband and wife, but the naming of defenseless, unsuspecting babies.
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Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water!
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Will you marry me? Do you have any money? Answer the second question first.
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Oh, are you from Wales? Do you know a fella named Jonah-He used to live in whales for a while
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Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other 999 follow women.
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The first part of the party of the first part shall be known in this contract as the first part of the party of the first part shall be known in this contract-- Look, why should we quarrel about a thing like this? We'll take it right out, eh?
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If you want to see a comic strip, you should see me in the shower.
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Don't be silly. I'll write you twice a week.
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I have an agreement with the houseflies. The flies don't practice law and I don't walk on the ceiling.
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I don't want to join the kind of a club that accepts people like me as members.
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Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.
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I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.
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I'll teach you to kick me...' You don't need to teach me--I already know how!
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I've been looking for a girl like you - not you, but a girl like you.
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You are going Uruguay, and I'm going my way
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