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Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does.
Groucho Marx
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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Doe
Witty
Book
Humorous
Writing
York
Mind
Comedy
Everybody
Half
Funny
Write
Practically
More quotes by Groucho Marx
Every time someone turns on a TV, I go in the other room and read.
Groucho Marx
One woman and one man might have been OK in your grandmother's day, but who wants to marry your grandmother? Not even your grandfather!
Groucho Marx
I've known and respected your husband for many years, and what's good enough for him is good enough for me
Groucho Marx
All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats.
Groucho Marx
I don't want to join the kind of a club that accepts people like me as members.
Groucho Marx
Two women at a resort discussed dinner: The food here is lousy, the first noted. You're right! And such small portions!! the second added
Groucho Marx
Mrs. Teasdale congratulates him on his coronation and sovereignty: The eyes of the world are upon you. Notables from every country are gathered here in your honor. This is a gala day for you. Firefly replies: Well, a gal a day is enough for me. I don't think I could handle any more.
Groucho Marx
She's afraid that if she leaves, she'll become the life of the party.
Groucho Marx
If you want to see a comic strip, you should see me in the shower.
Groucho Marx
Well I thought my razor was dull until I heard his speech, and that reminds me of a story that's so dirty I'm ashamed to think of it myself.
Groucho Marx
Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does.
Groucho Marx
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
Groucho Marx
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
Groucho Marx
Don't be silly. I'll write you twice a week.
Groucho Marx
Gerald Ford was unknown throughout America. Now he's unknown throughout the world.
Groucho Marx
Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
Groucho Marx
Firefly: Where is your husband? Mrs. Teasdale: Why, he's dead. Firefly: I'll bet he's just using that as an excuse. Mrs. Teasdale: I was with him to the very end. Firefly: Hmmph. No wonder he passed away. Mrs. Teasdale: I held him in my arms and kissed him. Firefly: Oh I see. Then, it was murder.
Groucho Marx
Chico: Here's the book, it's a dollar Groucho: Here's a ten, and shoot the change. Chico: I don't have change I'd have to give you nine more books.
Groucho Marx
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx
You're only as young as the woman you feel.
Groucho Marx
