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I've got the brain of a four year old. I'll bet he was glad to be rid of it.
Groucho Marx
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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Glad
Inspiration
Brain
Four
Year
Funny
Years
More quotes by Groucho Marx
I don't know. When I was born there was a nurse taking care of me. What's the matter? Couldn't the nurse take care of herself? Sure she could. I just found that out too late.
Groucho Marx
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
Groucho Marx
The Arab and the camel are inseparable. It's been said that and Arab would give up his wife rather than give up his camel. Personally, I haven't got a camel, but I think it's a great idea.
Groucho Marx
Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
Groucho Marx
Even the intellectual crowd will have none of me. Physically, I look like one of them. Graying at the temples, I walk with a slight limp and wear thick glasses.
Groucho Marx
I cannot say that I don't disagree with you.
Groucho Marx
When I invite a woman to dinner, I expect her to look at my face. That's the price she has to pay.
Groucho Marx
My mother loved children - she would have given anything if I had been one.
Groucho Marx
Since my daughter is only half-Jewish, could she go in the water up to her knees?
Groucho Marx
Why don't you go home to your wife? Better yet, I'll go home to your wife, and outside of the improvement, she won't notice any difference.
Groucho Marx
[Mrs. Teasdale]: He's had a change of heart. [Groucho]: A lot of good that'll do him. He's still got the same face.
Groucho Marx
I have nothing but respect for you -- and not much of that.
Groucho Marx
I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.
Groucho Marx
If you are not having fun you are doing something wrong.
Groucho Marx
My experience is that people are most likely to listen to reason when in bed.
Groucho Marx
Today's Father Day and we're giving you a tie, it's not much you know, it's just our way of showing you, you're a regular guy.
Groucho Marx
Here's to our wives and girlfriends...may they never meet!
Groucho Marx
John you say you met in an elevator. Was the elevator going up at the time, or down? This is very important, for going down in an elevator one always has that sinking feeling and for all I know you may have this confused with love. If you were going up, it is clearly a case of love at first sight.
Groucho Marx
If you want to see a comic strip, you should see me in the shower.
Groucho Marx
Poverty makes people sub-human Excess of wealth makes people inhuman
Groucho Marx
