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I've got the brain of a four year old. I'll bet he was glad to be rid of it.
Groucho Marx
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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Glad
Inspiration
Brain
Four
Year
Funny
Years
More quotes by Groucho Marx
I intend to live forever, or die trying.
Groucho Marx
Well I thought my razor was dull until I heard his speech, and that reminds me of a story that's so dirty I'm ashamed to think of it myself.
Groucho Marx
[He] may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot.
Groucho Marx
I shall drink no # wine before it's time! OK, it's time.
Groucho Marx
Television is where you watch people in your living room that you would not want near your house.
Groucho Marx
Years ago, I tried to top everybody, but I don't anymore. I realized it was killing conversation. When you're always trying for a topper you aren't really listening. It ruins communication
Groucho Marx
Chico: Here's the book, it's a dollar Groucho: Here's a ten, and shoot the change. Chico: I don't have change I'd have to give you nine more books.
Groucho Marx
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
Groucho Marx
You get a canoe later and I'll paddle you.
Groucho Marx
And stop pointing that beard at me, it might go off!
Groucho Marx
Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does.
Groucho Marx
Why should I care about posterity? What's posterity ever done for me?
Groucho Marx
I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place to get a decent meal.
Groucho Marx
Marry me and I'll never look at another horse!
Groucho Marx
I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.
Groucho Marx
How much would you want to stand at the wrong end of a shooting gallery?
Groucho Marx
If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.
Groucho Marx
How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them.
Groucho Marx
Mrs. Teasdale congratulates him on his coronation and sovereignty: The eyes of the world are upon you. Notables from every country are gathered here in your honor. This is a gala day for you. Firefly replies: Well, a gal a day is enough for me. I don't think I could handle any more.
Groucho Marx
Poverty makes people sub-human Excess of wealth makes people inhuman
Groucho Marx
