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Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Important
Something
Presentation
Witty
Humorous
Funny
Speak

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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I think you've got something there, but I'll wait outside until you clean it up.
Groucho Marx
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Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
Groucho Marx
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The difference between a politician and a snail is that the snail leaves its slime behind. Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
Groucho Marx
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I think that the Peeps or Peppies or Pipes diaries would be much more popular had there been a universal pronuncation of his name.
Groucho Marx
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If income tax is the price you have to pay to keep the government on its feet, alimony is the price we have to pay for sweeping a woman off hers.
Groucho Marx
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John you say you met in an elevator. Was the elevator going up at the time, or down? This is very important, for going down in an elevator one always has that sinking feeling and for all I know you may have this confused with love. If you were going up, it is clearly a case of love at first sight.
Groucho Marx
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Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse.
Groucho Marx
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I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt.
Groucho Marx
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Poverty makes people sub-human Excess of wealth makes people inhuman
Groucho Marx
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Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other 999 follow women.
Groucho Marx
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You get a canoe later and I'll paddle you.
Groucho Marx
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The foods that are recommended today are as palatable as a steady diet of wet blotters.
Groucho Marx
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I was going to thrash them within an inch of their lives, but I didn't have a tape measure.
Groucho Marx
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Take two turkeys, one goose, four cabbages, but no duck, and mix them together. After one taste, you'll duck soup for the rest of your life
Groucho Marx
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I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.
Groucho Marx
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How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them.
Groucho Marx
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Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does.
Groucho Marx
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The only real laughter comes from despair.
Groucho Marx
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I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.
Groucho Marx
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Television is where you watch people in your living room that you would not want near your house.
Groucho Marx