Quote

I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt.

Groucho Marx

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Sex
Remember
Firsts
First
Time
Receipt
Goggles
Receipts
Kept

More quotes by Groucho Marx

Image
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
Groucho Marx
Image
Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.
Groucho Marx
Image
Remember, the grass is always greener where you don't happen to be the neighbor.
Groucho Marx
Image
Remember men, you are fighting for the ladies honor, which is probably more than she ever did.
Groucho Marx
Image
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
Groucho Marx
Image
You are going Uruguay, and I'm going my way
Groucho Marx
Image
As soon as I get through with you, you'll have a clear case for divorce and so will my wife.
Groucho Marx
Image
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
Groucho Marx
Image
It is impossible to design anything that is foolproof because fools are so ingenious.
Groucho Marx
Image
Every time someone turns on a TV, I go in the other room and read.
Groucho Marx
Image
I think you've got something there, but I'll wait outside until you clean it up.
Groucho Marx
Image
Many years ago I chased a woman for almost two years, only to discover that her tastes were exactly like mine: we both were crazy about girls.
Groucho Marx
Image
You get a canoe later and I'll paddle you.
Groucho Marx
Image
A cigar makers organization once said that I was the most famous cigar smoker in the world. I dont know if thats true, but once while visiting Havana, I went to a cigar factory. There were four hundred people there rolling cigars, and when they saw me, they all stood up and applauded.
Groucho Marx
Image
It isn't so much that hard times are coming the change observed is mostly soft times going.
Groucho Marx
Image
Blood's not thicker than money.
Groucho Marx
Image
Women should be obscene, not heard.
Groucho Marx
Image
Love had forged ahead so swiftly that in no time it had displaced agriculture as the leading industry of the period. To anyone who has tried both, this wont come as much of a surprise.
Groucho Marx
Image
You're only as young as the woman you feel.
Groucho Marx
Image
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
Groucho Marx