Quote

I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt.

Groucho Marx

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Sex
Remember
Firsts
First
Time
Receipt
Goggles
Receipts
Kept

More quotes by Groucho Marx

Image
Well I thought my razor was dull until I heard his speech, and that reminds me of a story that's so dirty I'm ashamed to think of it myself.
Groucho Marx
Image
Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
Groucho Marx
Image
Poverty makes people sub-human Excess of wealth makes people inhuman
Groucho Marx
Image
Time wounds all heels.
Groucho Marx
Image
Money cannot buy you happiness, and happiness cannot buy you money. That might be a wise crack, but I doubt it.
Groucho Marx
Image
Gerald Ford was unknown throughout America. Now he's unknown throughout the world.
Groucho Marx
Image
Bel Air, I am convinced, was laid out by some diabolic sadist who deliberately decided not to use a compass or a surveyor.
Groucho Marx
Image
TV is the rat race of the century.
Groucho Marx
Image
Television is where you watch people in your living room that you would not want near your house.
Groucho Marx
Image
Anyone buying this book is going to be out a tidy sum if he is sucked in by the title. I wish I could write a real sexy book that would be barred from the mails. Apparently nothing whets a reader's appetite for literature more than the news that the author has been thrown into a federal pokey for disturbing the libido of millions of Americans.
Groucho Marx
Image
If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.
Groucho Marx
Image
Growing old is something you do if you're lucky.
Groucho Marx
Image
Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does.
Groucho Marx
Image
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
Groucho Marx
Image
I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book. . . . I think a lot of people who hate literature but love fried eggs would buy it if the price was right.
Groucho Marx
Image
Budget: a way of going broke methodically
Groucho Marx
Image
It is impossible to design anything that is foolproof because fools are so ingenious.
Groucho Marx
Image
I'll never forget my wedding day... they threw vitamin pills
Groucho Marx
Image
I think women are sexy when they got some clothes on. And if later they take them off then you've triumphed. Somebody once said it's what you dont see you're interested in, and this is true.
Groucho Marx
Image
Now there's a man with an open mind - you can feel the breeze from here!
Groucho Marx