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Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse.
Groucho Marx
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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Witty
Buying
Horse
Marriage
Humor
Dead
Like
Alimony
Hay
More quotes by Groucho Marx
Before you speak, make certain you have something worthwhile to say.
Groucho Marx
I hate London when it's not raining.
Groucho Marx
I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.
Groucho Marx
Blood's not thicker than money.
Groucho Marx
My experience is that people are most likely to listen to reason when in bed.
Groucho Marx
Time flies like an arrow fruit flies like a banana
Groucho Marx
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
Groucho Marx
I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
Groucho Marx
Now that you're Secretary of War, what kind of an army do you think we ought to have?
Groucho Marx
Oh, are you from Wales? Do you know a fella named Jonah-He used to live in whales for a while
Groucho Marx
Two women at a resort discussed dinner: The food here is lousy, the first noted. You're right! And such small portions!! the second added
Groucho Marx
Growing old is something you do if you're lucky.
Groucho Marx
I have an agreement with the houseflies. The flies don't practice law and I don't walk on the ceiling.
Groucho Marx
There's a man outside with a big black mustache. - Tell him I've got one.
Groucho Marx
Well I thought my razor was dull until I heard his speech, and that reminds me of a story that's so dirty I'm ashamed to think of it myself.
Groucho Marx
I don't have change I'd have to give you nine more books
Groucho Marx
If income tax is the price you have to pay to keep the government on its feet, alimony is the price we have to pay for sweeping a woman off hers.
Groucho Marx
The first part of the party of the first part shall be known in this contract as the first part of the party of the first part shall be known in this contract-- Look, why should we quarrel about a thing like this? We'll take it right out, eh?
Groucho Marx
I think you've got something there, but I'll wait outside until you clean it up.
Groucho Marx
Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.
Groucho Marx
