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I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.

Groucho Marx

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Groucho Marx
Age: 86 †
Born: 1890
Born: October 2
Died: 1977
Died: August 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Manhattan borough
New York City
Julius Henry Marx
Julius Marx
Refuse
Joining
Members
Join
Humor
Member
Funny
Club
Would
Witty
Life
Comedian
Humorous
Clubs
Membership

More quotes by Groucho Marx

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If the garbage man calls, tell him we don't want any.
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I cannot say that I don't disagree with you.
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You get a canoe later and I'll paddle you.
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A moose is an animal with horns on the front of its head and a hunting lodge wall on the back of it
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Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
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I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining.
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A thing that has always baffled me about women is that they will saturate themselves with a pint of perfume, a pound of sachet powder, an evil-smelling lip rouge, a peculiar-smelling hair ointment and a half-dozen varieties of body oils, and then have the effrontery to complain of the aroma of a fine dollar cigar.
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Here's to our wives and girlfriends...may they never meet!
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Now there's a man with an open mind - you can feel the breeze from here!
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To write an autobiography of Groucho Marx would be as asinine as to read an autobiography of Groucho Marx.
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I've got the brain of a four year old. I'll bet he was glad to be rid of it.
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How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them.
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I have nothing but respect for you -- and not much of that.
Groucho Marx
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Patience is the art of finding something else to do.
Groucho Marx
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Do you suppose I could buy back my introduction to you?
Groucho Marx
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He thinks I look alike!
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I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
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Chico: Here's the book, it's a dollar Groucho: Here's a ten, and shoot the change. Chico: I don't have change I'd have to give you nine more books.
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I'm not a vegetarian, but I eat animals who are.
Groucho Marx
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I write by ear. I tried writing with the typewriter, but I found it too unwieldy
Groucho Marx