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White pants should be worn on two occasions: One, never. And two, if you're selling ice cream.
Greg Proops
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Greg Proops
Age: 65
Born: 1959
Born: October 3
Actor
Film Actor
Improviser
Podcaster
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Phoenix
Arizona
Ice
Pants
Occasions
Selling
White
Two
Never
Cream
Worn
More quotes by Greg Proops
People will really believe anything. You may have noticed this. It’s not just me. Look around.
Greg Proops
President Clinton celebrates the first casual Friday at the white house by wearing leather chaps.
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Animals have two vital functions in today's society to be delicious and to fit well.
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I wear glasses. That's how you'll know me. I am the speccy one.... And I am proud.
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I love animals. I couldn't eat a whole one but I'll split one with you if you want.
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Don't say 'No,' say 'Gilbert,' ladies and gentlemen.
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I love the nightlife. I like to boogie.
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I'm old and my knowledge is strictly horizontal.
Greg Proops
I'm all for dropping lawyers into any war time situation.
Greg Proops
You leave white people alone in constant isolation for 2,000 years, and you know what their musical contribution will be? Riverdance!
Greg Proops
I think if you steal well, you're a genius. If you copy badly, you're a hack.
Greg Proops
Now, we're Americans. Technically, who is from this country? Only the Indians, who we graciously let dwell on their native casinos.
Greg Proops
Ever since you're little you hear this: 'The pilgrims left England to escape religious persecution and sneak religious freedom into the new world.' But even when you're little you're like, 'Umm.. Bullsh*t?'
Greg Proops
I just feel like history is very much alive and important and I don't, you know, I can't worry about whether people get it or not, per se.
Greg Proops
If you want to live in 'white world,' if you want to experience the stultifying boredom and penetrating ennui that homogeneity can bring, you can go to Canada any day of the year. It's an entire country named Doug.
Greg Proops
If Iraq's weapons are weapons of mass destruction, surely ours are weapons of growth and nurturing.
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I would like to thank ABC for giving me the Drew Carey award. It only goes to one lucky guy with glasses a year, and gosh darn it, tonight I'm the king of the... general area.
Greg Proops
In our world, all puns are beautiful and they are the highest form of comedy.
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Don't yell at people. Stand up for what's right. Put yourself in the other persons place. Respect women. Don't take no for an answer. Laugh at yourself. Don't believe what you are told. Fall in love.
Greg Proops
You can't smoke in a restaurant in Los Angeles, which is mildly ironic, when you consider the fact that you can't breathe outside a restaurant in Los Angeles.
Greg Proops