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I see guys dressing like they're in college - and they're not. I don't want to be that guy.

Greg Proops

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Greg Proops
Age: 65
Born: 1959
Born: October 3
Actor
Film Actor
Improviser
Podcaster
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Phoenix
Arizona
Dressings
Dressing
Guys
College
Guy
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More quotes by Greg Proops

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I think if you steal well, you're a genius. If you copy badly, you're a hack.
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You can't smoke in a restaurant in Los Angeles, which is mildly ironic, when you consider the fact that you can't breathe outside a restaurant in Los Angeles.
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If you want to live in 'white world,' if you want to experience the stultifying boredom and penetrating ennui that homogeneity can bring, you can go to Canada any day of the year. It's an entire country named Doug.
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I'm all for dropping lawyers into any war time situation.
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Now, we're Americans. Technically, who is from this country? Only the Indians, who we graciously let dwell on their native casinos.
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Don't say 'No,' say 'Gilbert,' ladies and gentlemen.
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I just feel like history is very much alive and important and I don't, you know, I can't worry about whether people get it or not, per se.
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I love animals. I couldn't eat a whole one but I'll split one with you if you want.
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I'm old and my knowledge is strictly horizontal.
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In our world, all puns are beautiful and they are the highest form of comedy.
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I work for a few at home who are devoted. People who are up now. Either they have some sort of bladder problem or they're extremely drunk. This is my crowd, these are the people I hope to get.
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Honesty and unpopular opinions are the toughest sell in a country with an irony-deficiency.
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Arizona changes its state motto to Damn, it's hot.
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President Clinton celebrates the first casual Friday at the white house by wearing leather chaps.
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Glasses are for the brave. I do not need to pretend that I am sighted. People who need glasses and don't wear them are slightly less treacherous than people who don't need them and do-like every shallow Hollywood star who wants to be taken seriously.
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I love the nightlife. I like to boogie.
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I did stand up first in high school, joined an improv group in college, kept doing stand up after that, no one could deter me. And I have no other skills really, so I'm sorta stuck with this now. It's a little late to switch over to an ornithologist.
Greg Proops
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We don't know anything about Scottish history. All we know is that an American guy painted his face blue and somehow they won.
Greg Proops
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Let me tell you about Australia. It's really, really, really, far from wherever you live on Earth. You fly and you fly and you fly. Then relativity takes over and you get younger and younger. And when you land, you're a gleam in your father's eye.
Greg Proops
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You're in a bar - grow up. You're drinking poison. You're trying to have sex unsafely with someone you don't know. Is secondhand smoke really the chiefest of your health concerns at this point?
Greg Proops