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I'm all for dropping lawyers into any war time situation.

Greg Proops

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Greg Proops
Age: 65
Born: 1959
Born: October 3
Actor
Film Actor
Improviser
Podcaster
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Phoenix
Arizona
Time
Lawyers
Dropping
Lawyer
Situation
War

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I love the nightlife. I like to boogie.
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Ever since you're little you hear this: 'The pilgrims left England to escape religious persecution and sneak religious freedom into the new world.' But even when you're little you're like, 'Umm.. Bullsh*t?'
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People will really believe anything. You may have noticed this. It’s not just me. Look around.
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You can't smoke in a restaurant in Los Angeles, which is mildly ironic, when you consider the fact that you can't breathe outside a restaurant in Los Angeles.
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Don't say 'No,' say 'Gilbert,' ladies and gentlemen.
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In our world, all puns are beautiful and they are the highest form of comedy.
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Arizona changes its state motto to Damn, it's hot.
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I would like to thank ABC for giving me the Drew Carey award. It only goes to one lucky guy with glasses a year, and gosh darn it, tonight I'm the king of the... general area.
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Think about everything you read and everything you see. The one thing we can learn from all the horrible things that have happened in the last 15-20 years is that hysteria is the last thing we need. Cool thinking, pragmatism, and analytical thought are most important at this point.
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I work for a few at home who are devoted. People who are up now. Either they have some sort of bladder problem or they're extremely drunk. This is my crowd, these are the people I hope to get.
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Animals have two vital functions in today's society to be delicious and to fit well.
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I love animals. I couldn't eat a whole one but I'll split one with you if you want.
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You leave white people alone in constant isolation for 2,000 years, and you know what their musical contribution will be? Riverdance!
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Glasses are for the brave. I do not need to pretend that I am sighted. People who need glasses and don't wear them are slightly less treacherous than people who don't need them and do-like every shallow Hollywood star who wants to be taken seriously.
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White pants should be worn on two occasions: One, never. And two, if you're selling ice cream.
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If you want to live in 'white world,' if you want to experience the stultifying boredom and penetrating ennui that homogeneity can bring, you can go to Canada any day of the year. It's an entire country named Doug.
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I see guys dressing like they're in college - and they're not. I don't want to be that guy.
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I did stand up first in high school, joined an improv group in college, kept doing stand up after that, no one could deter me. And I have no other skills really, so I'm sorta stuck with this now. It's a little late to switch over to an ornithologist.
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Let me tell you about Australia. It's really, really, really, far from wherever you live on Earth. You fly and you fly and you fly. Then relativity takes over and you get younger and younger. And when you land, you're a gleam in your father's eye.
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