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Don't say 'No,' say 'Gilbert,' ladies and gentlemen.

Greg Proops

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Greg Proops
Age: 65
Born: 1959
Born: October 3
Actor
Film Actor
Improviser
Podcaster
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Phoenix
Arizona
Gilbert
Gentlemen
Ladies
Gentleman

More quotes by Greg Proops

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I did stand up first in high school, joined an improv group in college, kept doing stand up after that, no one could deter me. And I have no other skills really, so I'm sorta stuck with this now. It's a little late to switch over to an ornithologist.
Greg Proops
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You're in a bar - grow up. You're drinking poison. You're trying to have sex unsafely with someone you don't know. Is secondhand smoke really the chiefest of your health concerns at this point?
Greg Proops
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Glasses are for the brave. I do not need to pretend that I am sighted. People who need glasses and don't wear them are slightly less treacherous than people who don't need them and do-like every shallow Hollywood star who wants to be taken seriously.
Greg Proops
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Animals have two vital functions in today's society to be delicious and to fit well.
Greg Proops
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Ever since you're little you hear this: 'The pilgrims left England to escape religious persecution and sneak religious freedom into the new world.' But even when you're little you're like, 'Umm.. Bullsh*t?'
Greg Proops
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Think about everything you read and everything you see. The one thing we can learn from all the horrible things that have happened in the last 15-20 years is that hysteria is the last thing we need. Cool thinking, pragmatism, and analytical thought are most important at this point.
Greg Proops
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White pants should be worn on two occasions: One, never. And two, if you're selling ice cream.
Greg Proops
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Honesty and unpopular opinions are the toughest sell in a country with an irony-deficiency.
Greg Proops
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You leave white people alone in constant isolation for 2,000 years, and you know what their musical contribution will be? Riverdance!
Greg Proops
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Don't yell at people. Stand up for what's right. Put yourself in the other persons place. Respect women. Don't take no for an answer. Laugh at yourself. Don't believe what you are told. Fall in love.
Greg Proops
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People will really believe anything. You may have noticed this. It’s not just me. Look around.
Greg Proops
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We don't know anything about Scottish history. All we know is that an American guy painted his face blue and somehow they won.
Greg Proops
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President Clinton celebrates the first casual Friday at the white house by wearing leather chaps.
Greg Proops
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I think if you steal well, you're a genius. If you copy badly, you're a hack.
Greg Proops
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I work for a few at home who are devoted. People who are up now. Either they have some sort of bladder problem or they're extremely drunk. This is my crowd, these are the people I hope to get.
Greg Proops
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I love the nightlife. I like to boogie.
Greg Proops
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If Iraq's weapons are weapons of mass destruction, surely ours are weapons of growth and nurturing.
Greg Proops
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You can't smoke in a restaurant in Los Angeles, which is mildly ironic, when you consider the fact that you can't breathe outside a restaurant in Los Angeles.
Greg Proops
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I just feel like history is very much alive and important and I don't, you know, I can't worry about whether people get it or not, per se.
Greg Proops
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I love animals. I couldn't eat a whole one but I'll split one with you if you want.
Greg Proops