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You leave white people alone in constant isolation for 2,000 years, and you know what their musical contribution will be? Riverdance!

Greg Proops

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Greg Proops
Age: 65
Born: 1959
Born: October 3
Actor
Film Actor
Improviser
Podcaster
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Phoenix
Arizona
Years
People
Isolation
Contribution
Musical
Constant
Leave
Alone
White

More quotes by Greg Proops

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Animals have two vital functions in today's society to be delicious and to fit well.
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Ever since you're little you hear this: 'The pilgrims left England to escape religious persecution and sneak religious freedom into the new world.' But even when you're little you're like, 'Umm.. Bullsh*t?'
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I think if you steal well, you're a genius. If you copy badly, you're a hack.
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Now, we're Americans. Technically, who is from this country? Only the Indians, who we graciously let dwell on their native casinos.
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Arizona changes its state motto to Damn, it's hot.
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You can't smoke in a restaurant in Los Angeles, which is mildly ironic, when you consider the fact that you can't breathe outside a restaurant in Los Angeles.
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I work for a few at home who are devoted. People who are up now. Either they have some sort of bladder problem or they're extremely drunk. This is my crowd, these are the people I hope to get.
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I'm all for dropping lawyers into any war time situation.
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Honesty and unpopular opinions are the toughest sell in a country with an irony-deficiency.
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People will really believe anything. You may have noticed this. It’s not just me. Look around.
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My feeling is, we ran from animals for three million years. It's our time now. If a cow could eat you, it would. And it wouldn't care how comfortable your truck ride over was, either.
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We don't know anything about Scottish history. All we know is that an American guy painted his face blue and somehow they won.
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I did stand up first in high school, joined an improv group in college, kept doing stand up after that, no one could deter me. And I have no other skills really, so I'm sorta stuck with this now. It's a little late to switch over to an ornithologist.
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I would like to thank ABC for giving me the Drew Carey award. It only goes to one lucky guy with glasses a year, and gosh darn it, tonight I'm the king of the... general area.
Greg Proops
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Let me tell you about Australia. It's really, really, really, far from wherever you live on Earth. You fly and you fly and you fly. Then relativity takes over and you get younger and younger. And when you land, you're a gleam in your father's eye.
Greg Proops
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You're in a bar - grow up. You're drinking poison. You're trying to have sex unsafely with someone you don't know. Is secondhand smoke really the chiefest of your health concerns at this point?
Greg Proops
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Don't say 'No,' say 'Gilbert,' ladies and gentlemen.
Greg Proops
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Glasses are for the brave. I do not need to pretend that I am sighted. People who need glasses and don't wear them are slightly less treacherous than people who don't need them and do-like every shallow Hollywood star who wants to be taken seriously.
Greg Proops
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White pants should be worn on two occasions: One, never. And two, if you're selling ice cream.
Greg Proops
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In our world, all puns are beautiful and they are the highest form of comedy.
Greg Proops