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I don't like the way my hair looks, so we're going to do the whole show over.

Greg Gutfeld

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Greg Gutfeld
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: September 12
Journalist
Television Personality
Television Presenter
San Mateo
California
Gregory John Gutfeld
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More quotes by Greg Gutfeld

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Paternity, paternity. Let's think about this. This discriminates against the childless. So you get a year off because you produce a brat. If anything if you have a child you should work more because your brat's going to annoy me at the restaurants.
Greg Gutfeld
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I am not the least bit religious, but at least I stick up for the good work of religion and the cascade of benefits that come from religion.
Greg Gutfeld
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People ask me what I am politically and I've previously offered this equation: I became a conservative by being around liberals. And I became a libertarian after being around conservatives.
Greg Gutfeld
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I think the reason why 'Red Eye' is popular is because we question the common assumptions that you find elsewhere.
Greg Gutfeld
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The irony of prison is that it takes years and years and years to plan an elaborate escape, but all you have is years and years and years.
Greg Gutfeld
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Chris Matthews is so nuts that if he ate a snickers bar it would be cannibalism.
Greg Gutfeld
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What I'm going to miss is the competition, being, that's OK, I can watch from the house.
Greg Gutfeld
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I'm so tired of the same old cliche costumes. When people dress up as animals, they always go as, like, lions and tigers and dogs. You know, why don't you try something different? Dress up like a lemur.
Greg Gutfeld
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Job creation is important I think, but it's not the critical issue for Republicans.
Greg Gutfeld
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I don't believe a religion affords any protection if they are connected to any kind of terror.
Greg Gutfeld
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Hollywood's schizophrenia over guns is matched only by their attitude toward taxes. Ever wonder why they film in Vancouver so often? It ain't for the beaches, I can tell you.
Greg Gutfeld
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Move somewhere with decent public transit so you don't drive drunk and hit somebody.
Greg Gutfeld
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[In] 2010, Woody Allen said that he felt Barack Obama should be a dictator so that he could get things done, and the first thing obviously that Woody Allen wanted done is to make it legal to have sex with stepdaughters.
Greg Gutfeld
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Ask dumb questions and listen quietly for the answers. That's a wisdom stair climber.
Greg Gutfeld
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Al Gore completely lied about climate change in an effort to make a lot of money.
Greg Gutfeld
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If the immigrant is responsible for assimilation of the country, and some of these people are in fact are born there. But if you find it unwelcoming to your own barbaric notions of equality, that is not on the country, that is on you. If you leave a horrible place, please leave your horrible practices behind.
Greg Gutfeld
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When you have a TV show or when you are running a magazine, you have to remember that your audience isn't rich. They're not made of money.
Greg Gutfeld
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He's like a baseball team owner who also wants to coach, but who also attracts fans, like David Duke, and now anti-semi Louis Farrakhan who also gave Donald Trump odd praise. Now maybe this is not Trump's fault, but he is truly a unifier getting white and black racist leaders to agree on one thing - him. Not to mention the democrats.
Greg Gutfeld
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You should just go, go to work, work hard, be a perfectionist, be a workhorse. If you work 10 years straight, you'll be comfortable and set for life. That is a fact.
Greg Gutfeld
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The people who whine about Fox News are hypocrites - they say they're totally tolerant, but when they run into someone who doesn't share their assumptions, they say, 'Fox News is evil, and it must be stopped.
Greg Gutfeld