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ObamaCare is to health care as a fart is to an elevator.

Greg Gutfeld

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Greg Gutfeld
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: September 12
Journalist
Television Personality
Television Presenter
San Mateo
California
Gregory John Gutfeld
Care
Elevator
Elevators
Fart
Health

More quotes by Greg Gutfeld

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I've always wondered, how did Hitler get away with so much for so long?
Greg Gutfeld
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The metric system was designed to get people to enter charity runs.Do you think you would go run a 3.1 mile race? No, but if somebody says, hey, 5 km. You go, 5km sounds pretty impressive.
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I never quit. I just got fired.
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If Russia had the same military power that America did, earth would be called Russia.
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When someone in power declares that something is broken that means it's actually fine. What they're really saying is, Let's change this so I like it and ruin it. Nothing is ever broken.
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The most problematic word in America is the word problematic. It's a wuss word used by people to silence language without actually saying that they want to silence you. They don't want to go full fascist.
Greg Gutfeld
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When you have a TV show or when you are running a magazine, you have to remember that your audience isn't rich. They're not made of money.
Greg Gutfeld
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Sanctuary cities are a lot like hitchhiking. And the abstract, it feels really good until you feel dead.
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Fact is, the desperate desire to be cool has skewed our culture toward nihilism, carelessness, and ineptitude. It is now cool to be an idiot. A jackass. It's cool to be a failure, as long as your failure is the basis for a reality show.
Greg Gutfeld
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You should try to get fired once in a while. It's good for you.
Greg Gutfeld
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Chris Matthews is so nuts that if he ate a snickers bar it would be cannibalism.
Greg Gutfeld
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If the immigrant is responsible for assimilation of the country, and some of these people are in fact are born there. But if you find it unwelcoming to your own barbaric notions of equality, that is not on the country, that is on you. If you leave a horrible place, please leave your horrible practices behind.
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Commencement addresses are usually garbage. They're for colleges seeking publicity.
Greg Gutfeld
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The great thing about being rich is, you can embrace practices that kill the poor - that's what socialism does.
Greg Gutfeld
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I think the reason why 'Red Eye' is popular is because we question the common assumptions that you find elsewhere.
Greg Gutfeld
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Al Gore completely lied about climate change in an effort to make a lot of money.
Greg Gutfeld
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Paternity, paternity. Let's think about this. This discriminates against the childless. So you get a year off because you produce a brat. If anything if you have a child you should work more because your brat's going to annoy me at the restaurants.
Greg Gutfeld
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The people who whine about Fox News are hypocrites - they say they're totally tolerant, but when they run into someone who doesn't share their assumptions, they say, 'Fox News is evil, and it must be stopped.
Greg Gutfeld
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When you talk about Islamic terror. You go, oh, you're an Islamic - you're Islamophobic because you besmirching all Muslims. No. I'm talking about Islamic terror.
Greg Gutfeld
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He's like a baseball team owner who also wants to coach, but who also attracts fans, like David Duke, and now anti-semi Louis Farrakhan who also gave Donald Trump odd praise. Now maybe this is not Trump's fault, but he is truly a unifier getting white and black racist leaders to agree on one thing - him. Not to mention the democrats.
Greg Gutfeld