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The first mistake is trying to explain morality to a terrorist. Like trying to teach a rock to drive. It is impossible.
Greg Gutfeld
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Greg Gutfeld
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: September 12
Journalist
Television Personality
Television Presenter
San Mateo
California
Gregory John Gutfeld
Rock
Like
Rocks
Mistake
Impossible
Teach
Terrorist
Firsts
Explain
Drive
First
Morality
Trying
More quotes by Greg Gutfeld
The longer I live, the more I'm convinced the world is just one big high school, with the cool kids always targeting the uncool.
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A CNN poll shows both Bernie Sanders and Hillary Clinton beating Donald Trump in the general. Are republicans about to elect a loser? Who knows? But at least we can say it sells great. Then in 2032, we can nominate Justin Bieber and start all over again.
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The metric system was designed to get people to enter charity runs.Do you think you would go run a 3.1 mile race? No, but if somebody says, hey, 5 km. You go, 5km sounds pretty impressive.
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Imagine if today, they invented a religion that advocated the killing of gays. We would not tolerate that. However, Islam is a religion that advocates that.
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I'm sure if you could survey the unborn they would prefer the chance for life over the options of solar power.
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Al Sharpton chases the spotlight the way Obama chases golf balls
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If the immigrant is responsible for assimilation of the country, and some of these people are in fact are born there. But if you find it unwelcoming to your own barbaric notions of equality, that is not on the country, that is on you. If you leave a horrible place, please leave your horrible practices behind.
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Why is our media quick to find evil in our local police, but tnot in Islamic terror?
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Move somewhere with decent public transit so you don't drive drunk and hit somebody.
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I don't believe a religion affords any protection if they are connected to any kind of terror.
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One thing I noticed when I was young was I was impatient for success. I think everybody is impatient for success. It will come. But don't - you shouldn't let that impatience drive you crazy.
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Playboy seems like a sad magazine for me. It seems like for men who would sit around in a bath robe.
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We're already going down that path with illegal drug use and incarceration. I can't imagine it getting any worse.
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The best thing about Ikea - I'm going to do a quiz here - the names. Do you know what a Floria Fin (ph) is? It's a candle. A Pogestra (ph) - table. A Bar Grick (ph) is a plate, an Eterleeg (ph) is a wine glass and a Scuggle (ph) is the name of my third nipple.
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I admire President Obama's ability to trust strangers.
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ObamaCare is to health care as a fart is to an elevator.
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You should try to get fired once in a while. It's good for you.
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What begins as a Utopian vision, always - always - ends in bloodshed. Because you have to force a utopia on a free people. Free people want to pursue their own happiness, but a one-size-fits-all approach requires herding the free, against their will, into the state's idea of what's right. Then it's not utopia.
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The thing which Reagan did, which was great, was he won the people. He marginalized the media. And that's what you need, an intellectual agility.
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I never quit. I just got fired.
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