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The irony of prison is that it takes years and years and years to plan an elaborate escape, but all you have is years and years and years.

Greg Gutfeld

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Greg Gutfeld
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: September 12
Journalist
Television Personality
Television Presenter
San Mateo
California
Gregory John Gutfeld
Prison
Plan
Plans
Takes
Years
Elaborate
Irony
Escape

More quotes by Greg Gutfeld

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The problem with the immigration debate, it's probably is the most poisoned and political debate of any issue, because you have this huge voting bloc that everybody says is yours
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When the government sees a poor area, its solution is to move the poor out.
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Delayed gratification is the one thing we ignore these days. And if you delay it, it becomes more pleasurable later in life.
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When someone in power declares that something is broken that means it's actually fine. What they're really saying is, Let's change this so I like it and ruin it. Nothing is ever broken.
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If the immigrant is responsible for assimilation of the country, and some of these people are in fact are born there. But if you find it unwelcoming to your own barbaric notions of equality, that is not on the country, that is on you. If you leave a horrible place, please leave your horrible practices behind.
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It goes back to the if identity becomes your achievement, what do you do, this is what happens? And I do think it leads to psychological disorders. You have to start doing things and stop thinking about yourself.
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What begins as a Utopian vision, always - always - ends in bloodshed. Because you have to force a utopia on a free people. Free people want to pursue their own happiness, but a one-size-fits-all approach requires herding the free, against their will, into the state's idea of what's right. Then it's not utopia.
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[If Republicans] got to put their kids into public school. They got to take public health. They would become libertarian faster than you could say Ayn Rand.
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Playboy seems like a sad magazine for me. It seems like for men who would sit around in a bath robe.
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If you're hiring, if you're the person doing the hiring, forgive a scar or two. Remember that when we were young, we were also idiots. There were just no cameras there to catch it.
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I am not the least bit religious, but at least I stick up for the good work of religion and the cascade of benefits that come from religion.
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Hollywood's schizophrenia over guns is matched only by their attitude toward taxes. Ever wonder why they film in Vancouver so often? It ain't for the beaches, I can tell you.
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The media is Obama's scandal condom.
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I guess if your heart's in the right place, the trash can go anywhere.
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The [Confederate] Flag is - literally - sewed division. People claim it means different things to different people, but it harkens back to the pro-slavery side of the war.
Greg Gutfeld
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ObamaCare is creating nothing but misery for everybody.
Greg Gutfeld
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Fact is, the desperate desire to be cool has skewed our culture toward nihilism, carelessness, and ineptitude. It is now cool to be an idiot. A jackass. It's cool to be a failure, as long as your failure is the basis for a reality show.
Greg Gutfeld
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When immigrants go into the worse neighborhood and they fix it up, they should become citizens.
Greg Gutfeld
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I think the reason why 'Red Eye' is popular is because we question the common assumptions that you find elsewhere.
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Job creation is important I think, but it's not the critical issue for Republicans.
Greg Gutfeld