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How many presidents, do you think, ever said to another guy: 'I can't believe we're doing this in the White House'?

Greg Behrendt

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Greg Behrendt
Age: 61
Born: 1963
Born: July 21
Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
San Francisco County
California
Gregory Behrendt
House
Another
Ever
Many
Believe
Presidents
Think
Guy
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White
President

More quotes by Greg Behrendt

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He's just not that into you if he's not asking you out. Because if he likes you, trust me, he will ask you out.
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Being brokenhearted is like having broken ribs. On the outside it looks like nothing's wrong, but every breath hurts.
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There are only so many ways to get people to go see stand-up, that it really is about the product it's not so much about the theme of the show.
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He's just not that into you if he only wants to see you when he's drunk. If he likes you, he'll want to see you when his judgment isn't impaired.
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Don't waste the pretty
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Always be classy. Never be crazy.
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Don't idolize anyone if you can. You know, be inspired by people, certainly, but don't idolize people... Because they'll let you down.
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Bored with the same type of misery over and over and over again.
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If a guy truly likes you, but for personal reasons he needs to take things slow, he will let you know that immediately. He won’t keep you guessing, because he’ll want to make sure you don’t get frustrated and go away.
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A friend of mine told a story about a date with a guy she was really excited about: He stood her up. He then called her, begging her forgiveness and giving some excuse. She told him to get lost, telling him that he only gets one shot with her, and he blew it.
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There will never be a good time, financially, to get married, unless you're Shaq or Ray Romano. But somehow people manage. If your man is using money as an excuse not to marry you, it's your relationship that's insecure, not his bank account.
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When it comes to men, deal with them as they are, not how you’d like them to be.
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Drinking, eating, shopping, revenge, rebound sex, drugs or whatever your poison may be will number the pain - but that's all.
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Try not to be four years into a relationship when it suddenly dawns on you that the guy you're with is a big, selfish jerk.
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Ive learned that anything in life worth having comes from patience and hard work.
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Deciding to get back together with someone is a complicated and difficult decision. Just remember that the person you are getting back together with is the same person who, not long before, looked you in your beautiful face, took full stock of you and all your qualities, and told you that he was no longer in need of your company.
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The reason it's so painful when someone disappears is you have to face the fact that the person you loved had probably left you a long time before he grabbed his coat and scrammed.
Greg Behrendt
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I want you to be yourself, but not with other dudes.
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Cheaters are people who have a lot of stuff to work out, and they're working it out on your time and with your heart.
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If my father is walking around going, 'Mmm, pussy,' he's thinking about eating the cat.
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