Quote

My buddy Tom... he'd been chasing a girl for two years, and he got her the old-fashioned way - dates and listening.

Greg Behrendt

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Greg Behrendt
Age: 61
Born: 1963
Born: July 21
Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
San Francisco County
California
Gregory Behrendt
Toms
Fashioned
Chasing
Listening
Girl
Two
Years
Dates
Way
Buddy

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My daughter genuinely asked me to hand her the basketball bat. I might be failing as a father.
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People are inspired to do remarkable things to find and be with the one they love.
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We (men) would rather lose an arm out a city bus window than tell you simply, “You’re not the one.” We are quite sure you will kill us or yourself or both—or even worse, cry and yell at us.
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Often the thought of pain is actually worse that the pain itself.
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If my father is walking around going, 'Mmm, pussy,' he's thinking about eating the cat.
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There's a guy out there who's going to be really happy that you didn't get back together with your crappy ex-boyfriend.
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If a man is really into you, nothing will stop him from being with you - including a fear of intimacy.
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There's nothing wrong with sending a quick note if you're busy or just want to flirt, but it's hard to have any real interaction over text. In the buffet of communication, text messaging should be a side dish, not the entree.
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The one cool thing with getting older is that you can actively choose to just be an eccentric.
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If a guy truly likes you, but for personal reasons he needs to take things slow, he will let you know that immediately. He won’t keep you guessing, because he’ll want to make sure you don’t get frustrated and go away.
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I'm tired of seeing great women in bullshit relationships.
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Don't waste the pretty
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..he may love you, he may miss you, but ultimately he's just not that into you.
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Alone also means available for someone outstanding.
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For me, a breakup changed my entire life. I was a mess. I really got rocked, and I ended up turning it into a positive thing.
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People say get a job doing something you love. So far no one has offered to hire me to eat Whoppers with a switchblade.
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But he was so great!' Yes, and the people who got on the Titanic thought they were going on a vacation
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We have become a sloppy bunch of people. We say things we don’t mean. We make promises we don’t keep.
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I have less friends, but I have more Cadbury Eggs.
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The day you realize you don't have to make sense to anyone is the day you start to make sense to you.
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