Quote

People say get a job doing something you love. So far no one has offered to hire me to eat Whoppers with a switchblade.

Greg Behrendt

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Greg Behrendt
Age: 61
Born: 1963
Born: July 21
Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
San Francisco County
California
Gregory Behrendt
Switchblade
Hire
Offered
Jobs
Something
Love
People

More quotes by Greg Behrendt

Image
For me, a breakup changed my entire life. I was a mess. I really got rocked, and I ended up turning it into a positive thing.
Greg Behrendt
Image
Always be classy. Never be crazy.
Greg Behrendt
Image
Wasting time in a relationship that blows is just that - wasted time.
Greg Behrendt
Image
Remember always what you set out to get, and please don’t settle for less.
Greg Behrendt
Image
Better than nothing is not good enough for you!
Greg Behrendt
Image
If a man is really into you, nothing will stop him from being with you - including a fear of intimacy.
Greg Behrendt
Image
Ive learned that anything in life worth having comes from patience and hard work.
Greg Behrendt
Image
Being brokenhearted is like having broken ribs. On the outside it looks like nothing's wrong, but every breath hurts.
Greg Behrendt
Image
Lying, cheating, hiding is the exact opposite of the behavior of a man who's really into you.
Greg Behrendt
Image
But he was so great!' Yes, and the people who got on the Titanic thought they were going on a vacation
Greg Behrendt
Image
You are not easily forgotten.
Greg Behrendt
Image
The one cool thing with getting older is that you can actively choose to just be an eccentric.
Greg Behrendt
Image
I believe in love in hindsight, meaning attraction and connection can be remembered as love at first sight. But how could you possibly know at first sight? That's too much pressure to put on a relationship.
Greg Behrendt
Image
If we're friends with someone and attracted to them, we're going to want to take it further.
Greg Behrendt
Image
If you can find him, then he can find you. If he wants to find you, he will.
Greg Behrendt
Image
If my father is walking around going, 'Mmm, pussy,' he's thinking about eating the cat.
Greg Behrendt
Image
Bored with the same type of misery over and over and over again.
Greg Behrendt
Image
Well, I knew instantly when I met my wife what a good relationship it was, compared with what I had been doing for the previous 20-odd years. She is my buddy, my partner, my friend. And part of being a comedian is that it's your job to look at life and regurgitate it in a funny way, to point out its absurdities.
Greg Behrendt
Image
My buddy Tom... he'd been chasing a girl for two years, and he got her the old-fashioned way - dates and listening.
Greg Behrendt
Image
There's nothing wrong with sending a quick note if you're busy or just want to flirt, but it's hard to have any real interaction over text. In the buffet of communication, text messaging should be a side dish, not the entree.
Greg Behrendt