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He's just not that into you if he only wants to see you when he's drunk. If he likes you, he'll want to see you when his judgment isn't impaired.

Greg Behrendt

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Greg Behrendt
Age: 61
Born: 1963
Born: July 21
Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
San Francisco County
California
Gregory Behrendt
Judgment
Wants
Impaired
Drunk
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More quotes by Greg Behrendt

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Can you deep fry the bacon? Oh how I wish you would.
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Ive learned that anything in life worth having comes from patience and hard work.
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Send her a quick note while you`re stuck in a long meeting. A lighthearted chat definitely makes the time go faster.
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Bored with the same type of misery over and over and over again.
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But he was so great!' Yes, and the people who got on the Titanic thought they were going on a vacation
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Don't you want the guy who'll forget about all the other things in his life before he forgets about you?
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Better than nothing is not good enough for you!
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Remember always what you set out to get, and please don’t settle for less.
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I want you to be yourself, but not with other dudes.
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My buddy Tom... he'd been chasing a girl for two years, and he got her the old-fashioned way - dates and listening.
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The word “busy” is the relationship Weapon of Mass Destruction. It seems like a good excuse, but in fact, in every silo you uncover, all you’re going to find is a man who didn’t care enough to call. Remember: Men are never too busy to get what they want.
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First of all, never buy a man a plasma TV until you're married. A lot of men once they have a plasma TV they don't need a girlfriend
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Try not to be four years into a relationship when it suddenly dawns on you that the guy you're with is a big, selfish jerk.
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Alone also means available for someone outstanding.
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She didn't love me that much, but she moved in with me. That's a plus. And then one night, I caught her making out with another dude on the driveway. That's a minus.
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For me, a breakup changed my entire life. I was a mess. I really got rocked, and I ended up turning it into a positive thing.
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Don't idolize anyone if you can. You know, be inspired by people, certainly, but don't idolize people... Because they'll let you down.
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Drinking, eating, shopping, revenge, rebound sex, drugs or whatever your poison may be will number the pain - but that's all.
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The day you realize you don't have to make sense to anyone is the day you start to make sense to you.
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Wasting time in a relationship that blows is just that - wasted time.
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