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Cheaters are people who have a lot of stuff to work out, and they're working it out on your time and with your heart.

Greg Behrendt

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Greg Behrendt
Age: 61
Born: 1963
Born: July 21
Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
San Francisco County
California
Gregory Behrendt
Heart
Work
Time
People
Cheaters
Cheater
Working
Stuff

More quotes by Greg Behrendt

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First of all, never buy a man a plasma TV until you're married. A lot of men once they have a plasma TV they don't need a girlfriend
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There are three kinda men in the world. There's men that own rope, men that use eye creme, and that dude from Nickleback.
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Alone also means available for someone outstanding.
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The word “busy” is the relationship Weapon of Mass Destruction. It seems like a good excuse, but in fact, in every silo you uncover, all you’re going to find is a man who didn’t care enough to call. Remember: Men are never too busy to get what they want.
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My daughter genuinely asked me to hand her the basketball bat. I might be failing as a father.
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There's nothing wrong with sending a quick note if you're busy or just want to flirt, but it's hard to have any real interaction over text. In the buffet of communication, text messaging should be a side dish, not the entree.
Greg Behrendt
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We (men) would rather lose an arm out a city bus window than tell you simply, “You’re not the one.” We are quite sure you will kill us or yourself or both—or even worse, cry and yell at us.
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Having feelings doesn't mean you have to have sex.
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If you can find him, then he can find you. If he wants to find you, he will.
Greg Behrendt
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The time it takes to feel better about a breakup is directly proportional to the time it takes to feel better about yourself.
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Often the thought of pain is actually worse that the pain itself.
Greg Behrendt
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There are only so many ways to get people to go see stand-up, that it really is about the product it's not so much about the theme of the show.
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Always be classy. Never be crazy.
Greg Behrendt
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I'm tired of seeing great women in bullshit relationships.
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Can you deep fry the bacon? Oh how I wish you would.
Greg Behrendt
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Two people in a relationship either grow together or apart over time.
Greg Behrendt
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Why should you feel honored for getting scraps of his time?
Greg Behrendt
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Drinking, eating, shopping, revenge, rebound sex, drugs or whatever your poison may be will number the pain - but that's all.
Greg Behrendt
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Before you look for validation in others, try and find it in yourself
Greg Behrendt
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The pain of being in a bad relationship is confusing. When it's over - it's over. No more confusion!
Greg Behrendt