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We have become a sloppy bunch of people. We say things we don’t mean. We make promises we don’t keep.

Greg Behrendt

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Greg Behrendt
Age: 61
Born: 1963
Born: July 21
Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
San Francisco County
California
Gregory Behrendt
People
Promises
Bunch
Promise
Keep
Become
Mean
Make
Things
Sloppy

More quotes by Greg Behrendt

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It`s the prettiest place on the planet. My childhood was like a dream. It`s like the last Mayberry.
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I love astute observations and really great wordplay. I love the way that Louis C.K. observes life, and I love the way Patton Oswalt talks about it.
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We (men) would rather lose an arm out a city bus window than tell you simply, “You’re not the one.” We are quite sure you will kill us or yourself or both—or even worse, cry and yell at us.
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When a guy is into you, he lets you know it. He calls, he shows up, he wants to meet your friends, he can't keep his eyes or hands off of you.
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Most people don't want to leave their wife and children behind but many people seem to want to take leave of themselves.
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Always be classy. Never be crazy.
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There will never be a good time, financially, to get married, unless you're Shaq or Ray Romano. But somehow people manage. If your man is using money as an excuse not to marry you, it's your relationship that's insecure, not his bank account.
Greg Behrendt
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If we're friends with someone and attracted to them, we're going to want to take it further.
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One of the suckiest and most frustrating facts of life is that sometimes relationship just end, often without reason. I truly believe that sometimes both men and women simply run out of love, even when there was a lot of it in the beginning
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Breakups hurt like a motherf*#ker, but they are not the end of the world. The pain is temporary, and if handled properly, they can even be life-changing.
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Cheaters never prosper. (Because they suck.)
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My daughter genuinely asked me to hand her the basketball bat. I might be failing as a father.
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Alone also means available for someone outstanding.
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It`s your version of whatever that is. We use those words because they are kind of empowering. Try to get back into your life and get back on track with dreams you have. There`s nothing more attractive than a person who likes herself.
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I have less friends, but I have more Cadbury Eggs.
Greg Behrendt
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Good enough to tweet, not to say.
Greg Behrendt
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Two people in a relationship either grow together or apart over time.
Greg Behrendt
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If he's choosing not to make a simple effort that would put you at ease and bring harmony to a recurring fight, then he doesn't respect your feelings and needs.
Greg Behrendt
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You already have one asshole, you don't need another one
Greg Behrendt
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As a guy I never liked being told to call, which my wife really never does, and that's why I call her as often as I do.
Greg Behrendt