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Before you look for validation in others, try and find it in yourself

Greg Behrendt

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Greg Behrendt
Age: 61
Born: 1963
Born: July 21
Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
San Francisco County
California
Gregory Behrendt
Validation
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More quotes by Greg Behrendt

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Well, I knew instantly when I met my wife what a good relationship it was, compared with what I had been doing for the previous 20-odd years. She is my buddy, my partner, my friend. And part of being a comedian is that it's your job to look at life and regurgitate it in a funny way, to point out its absurdities.
Greg Behrendt
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There's a guy out there who's going to be really happy that you didn't get back together with your crappy ex-boyfriend.
Greg Behrendt
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Cheaters never prosper. (Because they suck.)
Greg Behrendt
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People say get a job doing something you love. So far no one has offered to hire me to eat Whoppers with a switchblade.
Greg Behrendt
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How many presidents, do you think, ever said to another guy: 'I can't believe we're doing this in the White House'?
Greg Behrendt
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Feeling in love (or lust) and fear feel a lot alike. They both give you that anxious butterfly feeling in your stomach, a sense of excitement, and a general unease physically and mentally. It's easy to confuse love with fear.
Greg Behrendt
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She didn't love me that much, but she moved in with me. That's a plus. And then one night, I caught her making out with another dude on the driveway. That's a minus.
Greg Behrendt
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My daughter genuinely asked me to hand her the basketball bat. I might be failing as a father.
Greg Behrendt
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I've never tried to pass myself off as anything more than a comedian who wrote a dating book.
Greg Behrendt
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I'm tired of seeing great women in bullshit relationships.
Greg Behrendt
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The word “busy” is the relationship Weapon of Mass Destruction. It seems like a good excuse, but in fact, in every silo you uncover, all you’re going to find is a man who didn’t care enough to call. Remember: Men are never too busy to get what they want.
Greg Behrendt
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The day you realize you don't have to make sense to anyone is the day you start to make sense to you.
Greg Behrendt
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If my father is walking around going, 'Mmm, pussy,' he's thinking about eating the cat.
Greg Behrendt
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Lying, cheating, hiding is the exact opposite of the behavior of a man who's really into you.
Greg Behrendt
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The reason it's so painful when someone disappears is you have to face the fact that the person you loved had probably left you a long time before he grabbed his coat and scrammed.
Greg Behrendt
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It`s your version of whatever that is. We use those words because they are kind of empowering. Try to get back into your life and get back on track with dreams you have. There`s nothing more attractive than a person who likes herself.
Greg Behrendt
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Can you deep fry the bacon? Oh how I wish you would.
Greg Behrendt
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There's nothing wrong with sending a quick note if you're busy or just want to flirt, but it's hard to have any real interaction over text. In the buffet of communication, text messaging should be a side dish, not the entree.
Greg Behrendt
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I believe in love in hindsight, meaning attraction and connection can be remembered as love at first sight. But how could you possibly know at first sight? That's too much pressure to put on a relationship.
Greg Behrendt
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The one cool thing with getting older is that you can actively choose to just be an eccentric.
Greg Behrendt