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Don't you want the guy who'll forget about all the other things in his life before he forgets about you?

Greg Behrendt

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Greg Behrendt
Age: 61
Born: 1963
Born: July 21
Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
San Francisco County
California
Gregory Behrendt
Forgets
Guy
Forget
Things
Life

More quotes by Greg Behrendt

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I've never tried to pass myself off as anything more than a comedian who wrote a dating book.
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Cheaters are people who have a lot of stuff to work out, and they're working it out on your time and with your heart.
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Alone also means available for someone outstanding.
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The day you realize you don't have to make sense to anyone is the day you start to make sense to you.
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If you can find him, then he can find you. If he wants to find you, he will.
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The reason it's so painful when someone disappears is you have to face the fact that the person you loved had probably left you a long time before he grabbed his coat and scrammed.
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I'm tired of seeing great women in bullshit relationships.
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Often the thought of pain is actually worse that the pain itself.
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Wasting time in a relationship that blows is just that - wasted time.
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Drinking, eating, shopping, revenge, rebound sex, drugs or whatever your poison may be will number the pain - but that's all.
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First of all, never buy a man a plasma TV until you're married. A lot of men once they have a plasma TV they don't need a girlfriend
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When it comes to men, deal with them as they are, not how you’d like them to be.
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Send her a quick note while you`re stuck in a long meeting. A lighthearted chat definitely makes the time go faster.
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Cheaters never prosper. (Because they suck.)
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I will go anywhere if you say the phrase 'there might be cake.' I would go to the Department of Motor Vehicles, register somebody else's boat in Spanish, a language I do not speak, without ID - for cake.
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If my father is walking around going, 'Mmm, pussy,' he's thinking about eating the cat.
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Life is hard enough as it is without choosing someone difficult to share it with.
Greg Behrendt
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The time it takes to feel better about a breakup is directly proportional to the time it takes to feel better about yourself.
Greg Behrendt
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Being brokenhearted is like having broken ribs. On the outside it looks like nothing's wrong, but every breath hurts.
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My daughter genuinely asked me to hand her the basketball bat. I might be failing as a father.
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