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Life is hard enough as it is without choosing someone difficult to share it with.

Greg Behrendt

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Greg Behrendt
Age: 61
Born: 1963
Born: July 21
Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
San Francisco County
California
Gregory Behrendt
Hard
Love
Life
Choosing
Share
Difficult
Someone
Without
Enough

More quotes by Greg Behrendt

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I'm tired of seeing great women in bullshit relationships.
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Young people are gross with their faces and their hope.
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We have become a sloppy bunch of people. We say things we don’t mean. We make promises we don’t keep.
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There are only so many ways to get people to go see stand-up, that it really is about the product it's not so much about the theme of the show.
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He's just not that into you if he's not asking you out. Because if he likes you, trust me, he will ask you out.
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Feeling in love (or lust) and fear feel a lot alike. They both give you that anxious butterfly feeling in your stomach, a sense of excitement, and a general unease physically and mentally. It's easy to confuse love with fear.
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People are inspired to do remarkable things to find and be with the one they love.
Greg Behrendt
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I have less friends, but I have more Cadbury Eggs.
Greg Behrendt
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Deciding to get back together with someone is a complicated and difficult decision. Just remember that the person you are getting back together with is the same person who, not long before, looked you in your beautiful face, took full stock of you and all your qualities, and told you that he was no longer in need of your company.
Greg Behrendt
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If I had butterscotch pants and a cheetah sweater... I'd be just fine.
Greg Behrendt
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I want you to be yourself, but not with other dudes.
Greg Behrendt
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Busy' is another word for 'asshole'. 'Asshole' is another word for the guy you're dating.
Greg Behrendt
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My daughter genuinely asked me to hand her the basketball bat. I might be failing as a father.
Greg Behrendt
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Before you look for validation in others, try and find it in yourself
Greg Behrendt
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There will never be a good time, financially, to get married, unless you're Shaq or Ray Romano. But somehow people manage. If your man is using money as an excuse not to marry you, it's your relationship that's insecure, not his bank account.
Greg Behrendt
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Why should you feel honored for getting scraps of his time?
Greg Behrendt
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Cheaters never prosper. (Because they suck.)
Greg Behrendt
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Lying, cheating, hiding is the exact opposite of the behavior of a man who's really into you.
Greg Behrendt
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There are three kinda men in the world. There's men that own rope, men that use eye creme, and that dude from Nickleback.
Greg Behrendt
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We (men) would rather lose an arm out a city bus window than tell you simply, “You’re not the one.” We are quite sure you will kill us or yourself or both—or even worse, cry and yell at us.
Greg Behrendt