Quote

Tis but a scratch! A scratch? Your arm's off! No it isn't. Then what's that? Oh come on, pansy!

Graham Chapman

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Graham Chapman
Age: 48 †
Born: 1941
Born: January 8
Died: 1989
Died: October 4
Actor
Autobiographer
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Physician
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Leicester
England
Gray Chapman
Graham Arthur Chapman
Pansy
Pansies
Scratch
Scratches
Arms
Come

More quotes by Graham Chapman

Image
Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government.
Graham Chapman
Image
I'm afraid I'm not personally qualified to confuse cats, but I can recommend an extremely good service.
Graham Chapman
Image
In 1945, peace broke out. It was the end of the Joke. Joke warfare was banned at a special session of the Geneva Convention, and in 1950 the last remaining copy of the joke was laid to rest here in the Berkshire countryside, never to be told again.
Graham Chapman
Image
You know, there are many people in the country today who, through no fault of their own, are sane. Some of them were born sane. Some of them became sane later in their lives.
Graham Chapman
Image
We come from nothing, we are going back to nothing-In the end what have we lost? Nothing!
Graham Chapman
Image
We don't deliberately set out to offend. Unless we feel it's justified.
Graham Chapman
Image
John Howard Davies was not a very human person ... if you made a mistake of any kind, any sort of pause in speech, he would treat you rather as if he was a schoolmaster.
Graham Chapman
Image
When Beethoven went deaf, the mynah bird just used to mime.
Graham Chapman
Image
Bring out... The Comfy Chair!!!!
Graham Chapman
Image
My philosophy, like color television, is all there in black and white.
Graham Chapman
Image
I hope I will have achieved something lasting.
Graham Chapman
Image
I mean, if I went 'round saying I was an emperor, just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away!
Graham Chapman
Image
Sir Beldevere: What makes you think she's a witch? Peasant 3: Well, she turned me into a newt! Sir Beldevere: A newt? Peasant 3: [meekly after a long pause] ... I got better. Crowd: [shouts] Burn her anyway!
Graham Chapman
Image
Kilimanjaro is a pretty tricky climb you know, most of it's up until you reach the very very top, and then it tends to slope away rather sharply.
Graham Chapman
Image
McGough: I'm sorry. I'm afraid I've caught poetry. Mr Bones: Oh really? Well, don't worry, sir - I used to suffer from short stories. McGough: Really? When? Mr Bones: Oh, once upon a time...
Graham Chapman
Image
Death can really absorb a person. Lik most people, I would find it pleasant not to have to go, but you just accept that it's more or less inevitable.
Graham Chapman
Image
WHAT is your name? WHAT is your quest? and WHAT is your favorite color?
Graham Chapman
Image
This parrot is no more. It has ceased to be. It's expired and gone to meet its maker. This is a late parrot. It's a stiff. Bereft of life, it rests in peace. If you hadn't nailed it to the perch, it would be pushing up the daisies. It's rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-parrot.
Graham Chapman
Image
Oh Lord please don't burn us don't kill or toast your flock. Don't put us on the barbecue or simmer us in stock. Don't bake or baste or boil us or stir-fry us in a wok.
Graham Chapman
Image
One thing for sure - a sheep is not a creature of the air.
Graham Chapman