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Some people are amazed at my brain, but really it's nothing.

Gracie Allen

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Gracie Allen
Age: 69 †
Born: 1895
Born: July 26
Died: 1964
Died: August 27
Actor
Comedienne
Dancer
Film Actor
Singer
Stage Actor
San Francisco County
California
Grace Ethel Cecile Rosalie Allen
Grace Allen
Amazed
Brain
Funny
Nothing
Really
People

More quotes by Gracie Allen

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I don't see what difference it makes what side it's [your bread] buttered on. I always eat both sides.
Gracie Allen
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I'm having my platform run up by a movie set designer, so it will be very impressive from the front, but not too premanent. After all, there's no sense putting a lot of time and thought into something you'll have no use for after you're elected.
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All the other candidates are making speeches about how much they have done for their country, which is ridiculous. I haven't done anything yet, and I think it's just common sense to send me to Washington and make me do my share.
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Brains, integrity, and force may be all very well, but what you need today is Charm. Go ahead and work on your economic programs if you want to, I'll develop my radio personality.
Gracie Allen
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I read a book twice as fast as anybody else. First, I read the beginning, and then I read the ending, and then I start in the middle and read toward whatever end I like best.
Gracie Allen
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It's foolish to bet on a horse without talking to him first. I know it seems silly to ask a horse who's going to win a race - but it's no sillier than asking anyone else.
Gracie Allen
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I think there's so much good in the worst of us, and so many of the worst of us get the best of us, that the rest of us aren't even worth talking about.
Gracie Allen
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This recipe is certainly silly. It says to separate two eggs, but it doesn't say how far to separate them.
Gracie Allen
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I left my car parked at the top of Lombard Street Hill, and I forgot to put the breaks on. It's the funniest thing. The car is running down the hill.
Gracie Allen
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Education is worth a whole lot. Just think - with enough education and brains the average man would make a good lawyer - and so would the average lawyer.
Gracie Allen
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When you learn to make everybody happy, you will possess the golden secret of how to milk the contented voters. But do it in such a way that they won't think you want them to vote for you just because you need the money. They need the money, and besides, they can think up other reasons if they try.
Gracie Allen
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Never place a period where God has placed a comma.
Gracie Allen
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The President of today is just the postage stamp of tomorrow.
Gracie Allen
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I often put boiling water in the freezer. Then whenever I need boiling water,I simply defrost it.
Gracie Allen
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You kissed me like that when I was a blushing bride ...? I wonder what I was blushing about?
Gracie Allen
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It's a game everybody plays. If you see a man with a beard and holler Beaver! it's five points. And if you see a man with a moustache, it's onlI three points.
Gracie Allen
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The Senate is the only show in the world where the cash customers have to sit in the balcony.
Gracie Allen
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When my mother had to get dinner for 8 she'd just make enough for 16 and only serve half.
Gracie Allen
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Every politician must be able to keep both feet on the fence with his ear to the ground.
Gracie Allen
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They laughed at Joan of Arc, but she went right ahead and built it.
Gracie Allen