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I read a book twice as fast as anybody else. First, I read the beginning, and then I read the ending, and then I start in the middle and read toward whatever end I like best.
Gracie Allen
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Gracie Allen
Age: 69 †
Born: 1895
Born: July 26
Died: 1964
Died: August 27
Actor
Comedienne
Dancer
Film Actor
Singer
Stage Actor
San Francisco County
California
Grace Ethel Cecile Rosalie Allen
Grace Allen
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More quotes by Gracie Allen
I'm having my platform run up by a movie set designer, so it will be very impressive from the front, but not too premanent. After all, there's no sense putting a lot of time and thought into something you'll have no use for after you're elected.
Gracie Allen
Education is worth a whole lot. Just think - with enough education and brains the average man would make a good lawyer - and so would the average lawyer.
Gracie Allen
The President of today is just the postage stamp of tomorrow.
Gracie Allen
I often put boiling water in the freezer. Then whenever I need boiling water,I simply defrost it.
Gracie Allen
Never place a period where God has placed a comma.
Gracie Allen
This recipe is certainly silly. It says to separate two eggs, but it doesn't say how far to separate them.
Gracie Allen
All the other candidates are making speeches about how much they have done for their country, which is ridiculous. I haven't done anything yet, and I think it's just common sense to send me to Washington and make me do my share.
Gracie Allen
I left my car parked at the top of Lombard Street Hill, and I forgot to put the breaks on. It's the funniest thing. The car is running down the hill.
Gracie Allen
You kissed me like that when I was a blushing bride ...? I wonder what I was blushing about?
Gracie Allen
My mind works so fast. When I think of something I say it. Lots of times I say it even before I think of it.
Gracie Allen
It's foolish to bet on a horse without talking to him first. I know it seems silly to ask a horse who's going to win a race - but it's no sillier than asking anyone else.
Gracie Allen
I don't see what difference it makes what side it's [your bread] buttered on. I always eat both sides.
Gracie Allen
Gracie: Don't give up, Blanche. Women don't do that. Look at Betsy Ross, Martha Washington-they didn't give up. Look at Nina Jones. Blanche Morton: Nina Jones? Gracie: I've never heard of her either, because she gave up.
Gracie Allen
This used to be a government of checks and balances. Now it's all checks and no balances.
Gracie Allen
When my mother had to get dinner for 8 she'd just make enough for 16 and only serve half.
Gracie Allen
The Senate is the only show in the world where the cash customers have to sit in the balcony.
Gracie Allen
They laughed at Joan of Arc, but she went right ahead and built it.
Gracie Allen
When you learn to make everybody happy, you will possess the golden secret of how to milk the contented voters. But do it in such a way that they won't think you want them to vote for you just because you need the money. They need the money, and besides, they can think up other reasons if they try.
Gracie Allen
You've buttered your bread, now sleep in it.
Gracie Allen
It's a game everybody plays. If you see a man with a beard and holler Beaver! it's five points. And if you see a man with a moustache, it's onlI three points.
Gracie Allen
