Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
There are times when I've had ideas walking down the street that I thought were great, and the minute I got onstage, I would think of them and go, 'Wow, that would never work,' even before I did it in front of the audience.
Gilbert Gottfried
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Gilbert Gottfried
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: February 28
Actor
Comedian
Podcaster
Television Actor
Brooklyn
New York
Gilbert Jeremy Gottfried
Work
Streets
Never
Minutes
Onstage
Would
Audience
Wow
Think
Times
Minute
Thinking
Thought
Street
Ideas
Fronts
Great
Front
Even
Walking
More quotes by Gilbert Gottfried
I've never been one of those who wanted to fill my calendar up 90 percent of the time.
Gilbert Gottfried
In real life I'm a tall, blond Christian.
Gilbert Gottfried
I don't know if I change my act from century to century. Sometimes I'm onstage doing imitations and references to people who have been dead for 50 years.
Gilbert Gottfried
I used to go to the Improvisation Comedy Club every night in Times Square. How I didn't get killed in that area either means that 1) God is watching over me or 2) I am so insignificant to God that he didn't bother having me killed.
Gilbert Gottfried
I'm eventually gonna take the Daryl Hannah parts.
Gilbert Gottfried
If someone says that I'm the best at anything, I always just agree with them. I'm certainly not gonna argue.
Gilbert Gottfried
People have many theories about comedy, but being just plain funny is the one most important thing.
Gilbert Gottfried
The joy of the roasts is to watch people get hurt and offended, and then have to laugh to pretend they're a good sport.
Gilbert Gottfried
If someone else is paying for it, food just tastes a lot better.
Gilbert Gottfried
I find Washington audiences are basically the same as every other audience they watch me and go, 'Who's idea was it to go see him? And is it too late to ask for my money back?'
Gilbert Gottfried
I can't even find someone for a platonic relationship, much less the kind where someone wants to see me naked.
Gilbert Gottfried
Every time something pops in my head, I think twice about it and I do it anyway.
Gilbert Gottfried
I'm one of those people that picks up the remote control and just keep hitting constantly, even if I like the show I'm watching.
Gilbert Gottfried
I'm used to explaining to people why my jokes were funny.
Gilbert Gottfried
Reality TV has totally destroyed soap operas. They're gone. They used to be the biggest thing in the world - they're gone.
Gilbert Gottfried
A landlord is showing a couple around an apartment. The husband looks up and says, 'Wait a minute. This apartment doesn't have a ceiling.' The landlord answers, 'That's OK. The people upstairs don't walk around that much.'
Gilbert Gottfried
If you're a lead actor, people are just waiting to say 'you're too old' or 'you're too unhip.' If you're a supporting actor, you can just work forever.
Gilbert Gottfried
I predict one of these two teams will win the Super Bowl.
Gilbert Gottfried
Comedy historians take note: this Gottfried character doesn't have the best eye for detail - and, for a Jew, he doesn't have the best eye for retail, either.
Gilbert Gottfried
Back when Jerry Seinfeld was just another comedian hanging around the clubs, I'd imitate him to amuse myself and the other comics. The club owners would say, 'What are you doing that for? Nobody knows him.'
Gilbert Gottfried