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The joy of the roasts is to watch people get hurt and offended, and then have to laugh to pretend they're a good sport.

Gilbert Gottfried

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Gilbert Gottfried
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: February 28
Actor
Comedian
Podcaster
Television Actor
Brooklyn
New York
Gilbert Jeremy Gottfried
People
Laugh
Watches
Watch
Laughing
Joy
Roasts
Hurt
Offended
Sports
Pretend
Good
Sport

More quotes by Gilbert Gottfried

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Nothing can help my comedy.
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No, generally I think influence is used as a nice word for plagiarism.
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You know what my theory is? Accept me or go to hell.
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I'm eventually gonna take the Daryl Hannah parts.
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The pressure to being a comedian is being funny, but I've given that up, so there is no pressure whatsoever.
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People have many theories about comedy, but being just plain funny is the one most important thing.
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If you're a lead actor, people are just waiting to say 'you're too old' or 'you're too unhip.' If you're a supporting actor, you can just work forever.
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There are certain things I don't want to joke about. If it's about somebody else, it's fine. If it's about me, I think it's totally insensitive!
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I personally think Miles Davis is a lot funnier than me. And he's working more.
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I was talking to Jesus, and I said, Jesus, I feel like no one will ever accept me. And Jesus looked at me and said, You know what my theory is? Accept me or go to hell.
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I predict one of these two teams will win the Super Bowl.
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I've never been one of those who wanted to fill my calendar up 90 percent of the time.
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R2D2 has gotten more work since “Star Wars” than Carrie Fisher
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There are times when I've had ideas walking down the street that I thought were great, and the minute I got onstage, I would think of them and go, 'Wow, that would never work,' even before I did it in front of the audience.
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If someone else is paying for it, food just tastes a lot better.
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Every time I give a straight answer and read it in a magazine, I say, 'Ouch.' One day I'd like to talk to a psychoanalyst about why celebrities reveal so much of themselves in interviews.
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I sincerely apologize to anyone who was offended by my attempt at humor regarding the tragedy in Japan. I meant no disrespect, and my thoughts are with the victims and their families.
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I think a lot of people have too much time on their hands.
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I find Washington audiences are basically the same as every other audience they watch me and go, 'Who's idea was it to go see him? And is it too late to ask for my money back?'
Gilbert Gottfried
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I was Jewish, through and through, although in our house that didn't mean a whole lot. We never went to synagogue. I never had a Bar Mitzvah. We didn't keep kosher or observe the Sabbath. In fact, I'm not so sure I would have known what the Sabbath looked like if it passed me on the street, so how could I observe it?
Gilbert Gottfried