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I'm a very anti-vacation person. Because I'm always getting on planes for work, to me, a vacation is when I don't have to get on a plane.

Gilbert Gottfried

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Gilbert Gottfried
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: February 28
Actor
Comedian
Podcaster
Television Actor
Brooklyn
New York
Gilbert Jeremy Gottfried
Anti
Getting
Persons
Person
Work
Always
Plane
Vacation
Planes

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In real life I'm a tall, blond Christian.
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If someone else is paying for it, food just tastes a lot better.
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The joy of the roasts is to watch people get hurt and offended, and then have to laugh to pretend they're a good sport.
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One thing I can take credit for, along with the rest of show business, is when the red ribbons were out, we cured AIDS. Any advancements that came towards fighting AIDS were not done by scientists or doctors - it was people with little ribbons on their lapels.
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If you're a lead actor, people are just waiting to say 'you're too old' or 'you're too unhip.' If you're a supporting actor, you can just work forever.
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You can say ass, but you can't say asshole. That's why I always cringe when a character in a TV show refers to someone as an ass. Unless you're British, calling someone an ass really doesn't work. But those are the rules of television. You can be a dirtbag, but not a scumbag.
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A landlord is showing a couple around an apartment. The husband looks up and says, 'Wait a minute. This apartment doesn't have a ceiling.' The landlord answers, 'That's OK. The people upstairs don't walk around that much.'
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I've never been one of those who wanted to fill my calendar up 90 percent of the time.
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I'm one of those people that picks up the remote control and just keep hitting constantly, even if I like the show I'm watching.
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You never know what people will choose to be offended by.
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I remember being at the premiere of 'Beverly Hills Cop II' and the tremendous reaction from the crowd outside, then going to a party at a hotel afterwards where the speakers were blasting 'Shakedown,' a song from the movie. That felt like a show biz moment to me.
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I predict one of these two teams will win the Super Bowl.
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I'm terrible when I have to fill up free time. My days, if I'm not working, I wake up and figure out a way to kill time until it's time to go to sleep.
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If someone says that I'm the best at anything, I always just agree with them. I'm certainly not gonna argue.
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Reality TV has totally destroyed soap operas. They're gone. They used to be the biggest thing in the world - they're gone.
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Back when Jerry Seinfeld was just another comedian hanging around the clubs, I'd imitate him to amuse myself and the other comics. The club owners would say, 'What are you doing that for? Nobody knows him.'
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People have many theories about comedy, but being just plain funny is the one most important thing.
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I can't even find someone for a platonic relationship, much less the kind where someone wants to see me naked.
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R2D2 has gotten more work since “Star Wars” than Carrie Fisher
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Nothing can help my comedy.
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