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Laughter survives... it has to survive.

George Lopez

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George Lopez
Age: 63
Born: 1961
Born: April 23
Comedian
Film Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
LA
California
George López
Survives
Survive
Laughter

More quotes by George Lopez

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When you go to cable, there are no stations and no affiliates and they allow you to do your show
George Lopez
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Obama is the closest thing to a Latino that we have. Barack. Everybody wants to see his birth certificate too.
George Lopez
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When we got married, we agreed on a boy for me, and a girl for you. Mine's upstairs sleeping. Good luck with yours!
George Lopez
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I've gotten in trouble with every race you can imagine.
George Lopez
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At the factory, I deal with ex-cons, substance abusers, and sexual harassers. And I'm not just talking about my mom.
George Lopez
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Barack Obama may be black, but John McCain is the first Albino presidential candidate: he's completely see-through!
George Lopez
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You know how Mexican restaurants always have border in the name: Border Grill, Border Cafe. You wouldn't do that to black people: Kunta's Kitchen or Shackles. They don't do it to white people. You don't see the Honkey Grill, the Cracker Barrel... oh, nevermind.
George Lopez
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Life is great and golf has been one of the great parts of it for me.
George Lopez
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It's a great day in America when white people, black people and Latinos can all come together and pick on another minority.
George Lopez
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I didn't want to be nobody, and that was the only way I could be somebody was to do stand-up.
George Lopez
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I got a pain in my chest, and I can't breathe
George Lopez
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Presents? We already bought you a lot of things. Member when we were at the market and I bought you gum? You'member.
George Lopez
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The jewelry stores say, 'Tell your wife you love her with a diamond,' while wives tell you they love you with, 'Ok, but just because it's Valentine's Day.'
George Lopez
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80% of the women who were asked if they fake orgasms said yes. Actually, they said Yes! Oh God, Yes!
George Lopez
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Marijuana brownies are amazing. Very simple to make, too. Just get some Duncan Hines brownie mix and cook the weed right in there. Drop it right in with the butter. I don't know who came up with this idea first, but it's sheer genius.
George Lopez
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Life is moments going by, but if you don't grab them, they're gone. For a long time, the only moments that were available were bad ones. So now I make sure to grab the good ones.
George Lopez
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If the worst thing that can happen is that nobody laughs, then I can deal with that, because the worst thing that can happen at the factory is that I could lose a limb or be crushed by a huge machine.
George Lopez
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Look, I made a commitment to corn 17 years ago. Sure, I'm a man. I like to go to a barbecue and see beans that I like: baked beans, red beans, black beans, big plump garbanzos. But in the end, I always come home to my sweet, sweet corn.
George Lopez
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Angie, I've seen my mom wrestle two cops to the ground with a taser dart in her neck, and you cry when your shoes pinch. Good luck, Bambi!
George Lopez
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Immigration is an issue of global significance in America. And if you look at the terrorist alerts and attacks, Latinos [as a group] are not in the top five list [for] terror alerts.
George Lopez