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Angie, I've seen my mom wrestle two cops to the ground with a taser dart in her neck, and you cry when your shoes pinch. Good luck, Bambi!
George Lopez
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George Lopez
Age: 63
Born: 1961
Born: April 23
Comedian
Film Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
LA
California
George López
Good
Shoes
Dart
Luck
Pinch
Cry
Wrestle
Ground
Cops
Humor
Cop
Taser
Seen
Neck
Tasers
Funny
Necks
Angie
Two
Mom
Bambi
More quotes by George Lopez
Life is great and golf has been one of the great parts of it for me.
George Lopez
So I started to relax and would work on my act eight hours a day, sitting at a desk writing at my grandmother's house, and I would put on Richard Pryor Live on Long Beach and would play it like a loop and think and write
George Lopez
We are now the proud owners of a white boy. Now we have to shop in the caucasian isle and get sunscreen, mayonaise and mild salsa because the other ones really hawt!
George Lopez
I've gotten in trouble with every race you can imagine.
George Lopez
Everything we play when we are growing up, is team related. In this game (of golf) you can find all the answers yourself. You don't need to throw the ball in the air and play catch with yourself. You get a bucket of balls and go out there with your clubs, and you hit and learn and you get better. And there's no top.
George Lopez
I look at movies, unfortunately, and I still see a lot of movies [lacking diversity].
George Lopez
I had a very difficult childhood. I was surrounded by people who had both parents, which made me feel different. Having a bit of a rougher existence early on, it made me appreciate the work ethic that my grandparents instilled in me.
George Lopez
I didn't want to be nobody, and that was the only way I could be somebody was to do stand-up.
George Lopez
It was June 4, 1979, the first time I went on stage. I didn't know I could do it but I knew I couldn't not do it. I quit everything in my life and this was the one thing I couldn't quit.
George Lopez
Shows should just be able to be shows without hyphenating their lead characters.
George Lopez
As Latinos, you want [people] to come to America - not necessarily Latinos, but [anyone who wants] to come here for a better life. That's kind of how this country was founded and the history of this country.
George Lopez
Obama is the closest thing to a Latino that we have. Barack. Everybody wants to see his birth certificate too.
George Lopez
I'm a big fan of reality shows. I thought the first one, Dukes of Hazzard, captured white people perfectly.
George Lopez
One time, I was so hungry, I ate the beans in a bean bag chair.
George Lopez
Laughter survives... it has to survive.
George Lopez
No Angie, it's instant. Like when someone trips in the cafeteria and you're laughing so hard milk comes out of your nose, the guy next to you is laughing so hard he accidentally farts. BOOM! Friends for life!
George Lopez
Whoever is my relative, I will not be nice to them.
George Lopez
I got a pain in my chest, and I can't breathe
George Lopez
Presents? We already bought you a lot of things. Member when we were at the market and I bought you gum? You'member.
George Lopez
Making a movie about one group of people isolates the larger majority. That's what I require of the projects that I'm involved with. I would not ever make a movie strictly for Latinos.
George Lopez