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Max: What's a period? George: It's a bullet we dodge, go get ready.

George Lopez

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George Lopez
Age: 63
Born: 1961
Born: April 23
Comedian
Film Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
LA
California
George López
Period
Periods
Humor
Dodge
Ready
Max
Funny
Bullet
Bullets
George

More quotes by George Lopez

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I think we all feel the same things most of the time, we just don't know how to put it into words. When I'm on stage, I say it. The truth makes people laugh.
George Lopez
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David Letterman is the best late-night talk show host right now, hands down, and has been since he first took the desk.
George Lopez
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Life is moments going by, but if you don't grab them, they're gone. For a long time, the only moments that were available were bad ones. So now I make sure to grab the good ones.
George Lopez
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It was June 4, 1979, the first time I went on stage. I didn't know I could do it but I knew I couldn't not do it. I quit everything in my life and this was the one thing I couldn't quit.
George Lopez
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You know how Mexican restaurants always have border in the name: Border Grill, Border Cafe. You wouldn't do that to black people: Kunta's Kitchen or Shackles. They don't do it to white people. You don't see the Honkey Grill, the Cracker Barrel... oh, nevermind.
George Lopez
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I prefer my Mexican food to have a little bit of an animal that suffered a little bit. That's some of the best food.
George Lopez
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I had a very difficult childhood. I was surrounded by people who had both parents, which made me feel different. Having a bit of a rougher existence early on, it made me appreciate the work ethic that my grandparents instilled in me.
George Lopez
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When things are bad, it's the best time to reinvent yourself.
George Lopez
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Angie, I've seen my mom wrestle two cops to the ground with a taser dart in her neck, and you cry when your shoes pinch. Good luck, Bambi!
George Lopez
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If the worst thing that can happen is that nobody laughs, then I can deal with that, because the worst thing that can happen at the factory is that I could lose a limb or be crushed by a huge machine.
George Lopez
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I'm a big fan of reality shows. I thought the first one, Dukes of Hazzard, captured white people perfectly.
George Lopez
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Look, I made a commitment to corn 17 years ago. Sure, I'm a man. I like to go to a barbecue and see beans that I like: baked beans, red beans, black beans, big plump garbanzos. But in the end, I always come home to my sweet, sweet corn.
George Lopez
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I'd shake his hand, but I think that's what's holding up his pants.
George Lopez
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Whoever is my relative, I will not be nice to them.
George Lopez
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The jewelry stores say, 'Tell your wife you love her with a diamond,' while wives tell you they love you with, 'Ok, but just because it's Valentine's Day.'
George Lopez
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As Latinos, you want [people] to come to America - not necessarily Latinos, but [anyone who wants] to come here for a better life. That's kind of how this country was founded and the history of this country.
George Lopez
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I've spent days in cinemas answering questions from the audience, in interviews, travelling abroad, and all they do is thank me nicely.
George Lopez
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We are now the proud owners of a white boy. Now we have to shop in the caucasian isle and get sunscreen, mayonaise and mild salsa because the other ones really hawt!
George Lopez
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It's a great day in America when white people, black people and Latinos can all come together and pick on another minority.
George Lopez
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Everything we play when we are growing up, is team related. In this game (of golf) you can find all the answers yourself. You don't need to throw the ball in the air and play catch with yourself. You get a bucket of balls and go out there with your clubs, and you hit and learn and you get better. And there's no top.
George Lopez