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if you make waffles, throw out the first one.

George Lopez

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George Lopez
Age: 63
Born: 1961
Born: April 23
Comedian
Film Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
LA
California
George López
Make
Waffles
Throw
Humor
Funny
Firsts
First

More quotes by George Lopez

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Life is great and golf has been one of the great parts of it for me.
George Lopez
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One time, I was so hungry, I ate the beans in a bean bag chair.
George Lopez
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I didn't want to be nobody, and that was the only way I could be somebody was to do stand-up.
George Lopez
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Life is moments going by, but if you don't grab them, they're gone. For a long time, the only moments that were available were bad ones. So now I make sure to grab the good ones.
George Lopez
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Presents? We already bought you a lot of things. Member when we were at the market and I bought you gum? You'member.
George Lopez
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We are now the proud owners of a white boy. Now we have to shop in the caucasian isle and get sunscreen, mayonaise and mild salsa because the other ones really hawt!
George Lopez
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Sarah Palin is Latina. Pay-leen. She has an infant and a grandkid the same age. Latina!
George Lopez
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I'd love to have Michael Jackson [in my show] because he's black and white. So he would appeal to a universal demographic.
George Lopez
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I got a pain in my chest, and I can't breathe
George Lopez
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I had a very difficult childhood. I was surrounded by people who had both parents, which made me feel different. Having a bit of a rougher existence early on, it made me appreciate the work ethic that my grandparents instilled in me.
George Lopez
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I spend a lot of time alone and my wife understands that I need to be alone. I enjoy being alone. But I'm never lonely.
George Lopez
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When I first heard about Beverly Hills Chihuahua, I thought, no. This, this is ridiculous. And then you read the script and you close the script and you go, They aren't going to be able to do that with real dogs. How are they going to do that? You're going to see the strings. But they did.
George Lopez
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David Letterman is the best late-night talk show host right now, hands down, and has been since he first took the desk.
George Lopez
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Marijuana brownies are amazing. Very simple to make, too. Just get some Duncan Hines brownie mix and cook the weed right in there. Drop it right in with the butter. I don't know who came up with this idea first, but it's sheer genius.
George Lopez
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80% of the women who were asked if they fake orgasms said yes. Actually, they said Yes! Oh God, Yes!
George Lopez
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Whoever is my relative, I will not be nice to them.
George Lopez
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Obama is the closest thing to a Latino that we have. Barack. Everybody wants to see his birth certificate too.
George Lopez
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I never realized I could love people as much as I do now.
George Lopez
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You know, you walk through this hotel, you're not going to see all white people you're not going to see all black people you're going to see what the world looks like. I promised myself that if I ever got an opportunity where I would be able to make a difference and have a say, that I would want to deliver [that] message [of inclusivity].
George Lopez
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I'm a big fan of reality shows. I thought the first one, Dukes of Hazzard, captured white people perfectly.
George Lopez