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Whoever is my relative, I will not be nice to them.

George Lopez

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George Lopez
Age: 63
Born: 1961
Born: April 23
Comedian
Film Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
LA
California
George López
Funny
Relative
Whoever
Comedy
Nice

More quotes by George Lopez

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So I started to relax and would work on my act eight hours a day, sitting at a desk writing at my grandmother's house, and I would put on Richard Pryor Live on Long Beach and would play it like a loop and think and write
George Lopez
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As Latinos, you want [people] to come to America - not necessarily Latinos, but [anyone who wants] to come here for a better life. That's kind of how this country was founded and the history of this country.
George Lopez
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80% of the women who were asked if they fake orgasms said yes. Actually, they said Yes! Oh God, Yes!
George Lopez
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I spend a lot of time alone and my wife understands that I need to be alone. I enjoy being alone. But I'm never lonely.
George Lopez
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Sarah Palin is Latina. Pay-leen. She has an infant and a grandkid the same age. Latina!
George Lopez
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I can never do nothing in this house!
George Lopez
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Max: What's a period? George: It's a bullet we dodge, go get ready.
George Lopez
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I look at movies, unfortunately, and I still see a lot of movies [lacking diversity].
George Lopez
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You know how Mexican restaurants always have border in the name: Border Grill, Border Cafe. You wouldn't do that to black people: Kunta's Kitchen or Shackles. They don't do it to white people. You don't see the Honkey Grill, the Cracker Barrel... oh, nevermind.
George Lopez
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I love comedy and I would write things to myself as an exercise in writing. I didn't do well for years, and I quit. I started to break down why I was afraid and started to look at people I admired, like Richard Pryor, Eddie Murphy, Freddie Prinze, George Carlin and all.
George Lopez
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When we got married, we agreed on a boy for me, and a girl for you. Mine's upstairs sleeping. Good luck with yours!
George Lopez
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One time, I was so hungry, I ate the beans in a bean bag chair.
George Lopez
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if you make waffles, throw out the first one.
George Lopez
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You know, you walk through this hotel, you're not going to see all white people you're not going to see all black people you're going to see what the world looks like. I promised myself that if I ever got an opportunity where I would be able to make a difference and have a say, that I would want to deliver [that] message [of inclusivity].
George Lopez
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I got a pain in my chest, and I can't breathe
George Lopez
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Life is moments going by, but if you don't grab them, they're gone. For a long time, the only moments that were available were bad ones. So now I make sure to grab the good ones.
George Lopez
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Immigration is an issue of global significance in America. And if you look at the terrorist alerts and attacks, Latinos [as a group] are not in the top five list [for] terror alerts.
George Lopez
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Barack Obama may be black, but John McCain is the first Albino presidential candidate: he's completely see-through!
George Lopez
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Obama is the closest thing to a Latino that we have. Barack. Everybody wants to see his birth certificate too.
George Lopez
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No Angie, it's instant. Like when someone trips in the cafeteria and you're laughing so hard milk comes out of your nose, the guy next to you is laughing so hard he accidentally farts. BOOM! Friends for life!
George Lopez