Quote

One philosopher has rightly said that property is theft. But I'd like to use my future ownership of property to give something back.

George Carlin

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Property
Future
Use
Give
Back
Theft
Giving
Rightly
Something
Ownership
Like
Philosopher

More quotes by George Carlin

Image
There are two types of people: One strives to control his environment, the other strives not to let his environment control him. I like to control my environment, because I feel if I have my physical space in order, then I'm free to dream.
George Carlin
Image
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
George Carlin
Image
All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another
George Carlin
Image
We get what we deserve. They are our elected officials.
George Carlin
Image
That's why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.
George Carlin
Image
I'll bet there aren't too many people hooked on crack who can play the bagpipes.
George Carlin
Image
Life is a zero sum game.
George Carlin
Image
When I first heard the song Don't worry - be happy I realized it was exactly the kind of mindless philosophy that Americans would respond to. It would make a great national anthem along with Me first.
George Carlin
Image
The Class Clown album was done totally sober. I'd realized what a hell I'd made for myself and I cleaned up completely for three months. You can hear the clarity of my thinking and of my speech on that album.
George Carlin
Image
Art, music, and philosophy are merely poignant examples of what we might have been had not the priests and traders gotten hold of us.
George Carlin
Image
Suppose I could shoot myself in the mouth, but what if I miss? People will laugh at me.
George Carlin
Image
I've never been quarantined. But the more I look around the more I think it might not be a bad idea.
George Carlin
Image
What I hated most was seeing those priests and brothers getting so much pleasure out of inflicting pain. I wondered what was wrong with them.
George Carlin
Image
Every day I break my own personal record for number of days I have been alive.
George Carlin
Image
At best, God can be viewed as nothing more than an uncaring incompetent father-figure
George Carlin
Image
When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to hear '27 months.' 'He's two' will do just fine. He's not a cheese. And I didn't really care in the first place.
George Carlin
Image
Why do 'slow down' and 'slow up' mean the same thing? Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?
George Carlin
Image
So far, this is the oldest I've been.
George Carlin
Image
The wisest man I ever knew taught me something I never forgot. And although I never forgot it, I never quite memorized it either. So what I’m left with is the memory of having learned something very wise that I can’t quite remember.
George Carlin
Image
When it comes to bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims: religion... Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do.
George Carlin