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My left descending septal branch artery decided to close without consultation with any of my other organs. It happened on Saint Patrick's Day, 1978.
George Carlin
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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Left
Descending
Without
Branch
Organs
Branches
Saint
Artery
Decided
Consultation
Close
Arteries
Happened
Patrick
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Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. That's just common sense!
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When you think about it, 12:15 P.M. is actually 11:75 A.M.
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In the 'bullshit department' a businessman can't hold a candle to a clergyman.
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The things that matter in this country have been reduced in choice, there are two political parties, there are a handful insurance companies, there are six or seven information centers.. but if you want a bagel there are 23 flavors. Because you have the illusion of choice!
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Life is a series of dogs.
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Irony deals with opposites it has nothing to do with coincidence.
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Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
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Ever wonder about those people who spend $2 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backward.
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Have you ever wondered why Republicans are so interested in encouraging people to volunteer in their communities? It’s because volunteers work for no pay. Republicans have been trying to get people to work for no pay for a long time.
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Is a vegetarian permitted to eat animal crackers?
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I quit school in ninth grade, even though I was good at the studies. I knew I didn't need school for what I wanted.
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Test of Metal: Will of Iron, Nerves of Steel, Heart of Gold, Balls of Brass.
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How come when it's us, it's an abortion, and when it's a chicken, it's an omelette? Are we so much better than chickens all of a sudden? When did this happen that we passed chickens in goodness? Name six ways we're better than chickens. See, nobody can do it! You know why? 'Cause chickens are decent people.
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