Quote

The Class Clown album was done totally sober. I'd realized what a hell I'd made for myself and I cleaned up completely for three months. You can hear the clarity of my thinking and of my speech on that album.

George Carlin

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George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Three
Realized
Done
Totally
Made
Speech
Cleaned
Thinking
Completely
Clown
Months
Sober
Hell
Album
Hear
Clarity
Class
Albums

More quotes by George Carlin

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You're all going to die. I hate to remind you, but it is on your schedule. It probably won't happen when you'd like generally, it's an inconvenience.
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Ah, to be a bird. To fly the skies, sing my song, and best of all occasionally peck someone's eyes out.
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Suppose I could shoot myself in the mouth, but what if I miss? People will laugh at me.
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You never see a smiling runner.
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Things I wonder about the FBI's list of the Ten Most Wanted criminals: When they catch a guy and he comes off the list, does number eleven automatically move up? And does he see it as a promotion? Does he call his criminal friends and say, I made it, Bruno. I'm finally on the list?
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When you look at the average American you realize there's nothing nature enjoys more than a good joke.
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No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
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That invisible hand of Adam Smith seems to offer an extended middle finger to an awful lot of people.
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War is rich old men protecting their property by sending middle class and lower class young men off to die. It always has been.
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The planet isn't going anywhere. We are.
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Not only do I not know what's going on, I wouldn't know what to do about it if I did.
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If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
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People have material needs, but you don't need a deodorant for every different day of the week. You don't need four hundred varieties of mustard. This is what I call too many choices. There are too many choices in America.
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I respect animals. I have more sympathy for an injured or dead animal than I do for an injured or dead human being, because human beings participate and cooperate in their own undoing. Animals are completely innocent. There are no innocent human beings.
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One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
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Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever.
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I did a lot of thinking, and used mental activity to relieve whatever feelings I had. I became very left-brained, and I was good in school. That is, I was a smart kid.
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Did you ever look at your watch, and you look away... and you don't know what time it is?
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I find that an entertainer is quite content to sit still, and I think an artist always has a little motion, always going somewhere. May not know where it is, but there is some sort of unnamed destination. There is some pulling, some movement. So I just found myself in that category according to my own analysis.
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I'm thinking of buying a church and changing it around: maybe selling crack and having a few whores in the pew.
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